Criticism & Empathy

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“Whenever you feel like criticizing any one…just remember that all the people in this world haven’t had the advantages that you’ve had.” ~F. Scott Fitzgerald

This is an interesting perspective and I agree for the most part. Sometimes criticism is necessary or good. Constructive criticism that is.

But it’s not always necessary. And not always good. Some of us really do have more advantages or experience than others, experience that helps us make better decisions or contributes to us ending up certain ways that others do not.

We may not even realize it. We all have walked  different paths in this life, experienced different things, have different backgrounds and upbringings, biology/genetics, opportunities and things that all contribute to us getting where we are right now. Ultimately it’s our choices (both conscious and unconscious ones, direct & indirect, the choice to do nothing…) that get us where we are, for the most part. But our choices are often influenced by various factors. Let’s try to go easy on the negative judging(not an order/demand, just a friendly suggestion)! This isn’t to justify callous and reckless actions, just to promote more love & understanding. It’s also not to say that some people are victims of circumstance or have no ability to make choices. That’s disempowering. For most of us, no matter what happens beyond our control, we have the power to choose positive things, reactions, attitudes…

 For some, it’s much easier to make positive choices than for some others. Like cigarettes, alcohol and other drugs, for example. It’s usually a choice to consume those in the first place no matter what happened to us. We have the power to say no to drugs or to say yes to them. And some take them and never become addicted while others fall prey to addiction. It doesn’t make one morally better for not becoming addicted. Some are just more susceptible. 
Anyway, some people are more likely to take illicit drugs than others, maybe someone who experiences trauma or depression or other painful experiences or someone exposed to drug use at an early age. 

It’s their choice at first but maybe influenced by experiences that contribute to them giving into temptation. 

I never considered taking illicit drugs or getting drunk or even drinking alcoholic things (with the exception of a few sips many moons ago). It’s not at all my cup of tea. But that doesn’t put me in a position to judge people negatively who make different choices than me, even lousy choices or those with grave consequences.

Homelessness is another example where it is so easy for some to judge. None of us are immune to becoming homeless. Any of us can be struck by some tragedy at any moment.

Many homeless people don’t have the advantages that many of us have. Some are severely mentally ill, some are struggling with addiction, some lost everything they own to a financial crisis, a housefire…, some don’t have families or friends who take them in. 
I have never been in a position to be homeless. I have always lived with my mom and unlike some people’s family, she wouldn’t ever throw me out no matter how much trouble I can ever be. Not everyone has that advantage.

Homeless people do have the power to make choices even though it is probably very difficult and even if for now the choice is to take one simple positive step for the better and some have made choices to contribute to where they are now, either consciously or unconsciously. It’s not being cold to say that. It’s disempowering to say otherwise. We all, as long as we’re alive, have the power to choose. 

Another example is people not having or displaying good grammar skills. I see so many people making fun of them and stuff. Must be great to be so perfect!

Not everyone has access to a good education, some have learning disabilities, some just really don’t care… So what?

We all have the power to make choices if we’re alive.

But not everyone yet realizes that and not everyone has advantages that make certain choices easy. 

So before we judge others in cold ways, how about instead we love & encourage them?  In non condescending ways. 

This quote is a great reminder to connect with our empathy and try to put our own self in someone else’s place as much as we can, and show love, compassion, encouragement instead of cold judgment. This goes for any person in any situation or making choices we disagree with.

Also here is a beautiful Country song! One of my favorites.

“I got rice cookin’ in the microwave
Got a three day beard I don’t plan to shave
And it’s a goofy thing but I just gotta say, hey
I’m doin’ alright
Yeah I think I’ll make me some homemade soup
I’m feelin’ pretty good and that’s the truth
It’s neither drink nor drug induced, no
I’m just doin’ alright
And it’s a great day to be alive
I know the sun’s still shinin’
When I close my eyes
There’s some hard times in the neighborhood
But why can’t everyday be just this good”

(everyday can be! It’s all about that attitude!) 😀 ❤

It’s a great day to be alive – Travis Tritt – desktop

It’s a great day to be alive – mobile

It IS a great day to be alive! Every day is! I feel this way often and it’s great to have reminders like this song! 

I’m at work right now and the wifi is working for once! Lol 

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever in the world you are!

Much love & light to you now & forever!
Always remember, I love you! ❤ ❤

😀

xoxo Kim

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