Archive | December 2018

In loving memory of sweet Boo, boo❤🐾

How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”❤

This is Boo. I was his nanny for two years. I just received heartbreaking news that he died. He was very sick and thankfully very old so he lived a long life for a kitty. His mommy & daddy gave him the best, loving furever home a kitty can have, along with his brother, a doggy.

He was the sweetest kitty, so loving and gentle. He never bit or scratched me when I would give him his medication in a syringe even though he did not like it at all. He loved treats and pets and kisses and would purr & meow happily when I visited.

I used to not handle grief & loss well. I used to view the loss of a human or animal I knew as something insurmountable, something I couldn’t possibly overcome. Often when someone would die, I wanted to die too, to stop the pain. Sometimes, I still have fleeting moments like that. To me, it’s just as devastating to lose an animal as to lose a human, although I have much more experience with losing animals and have felt it to be less traumatic than losing a human.

I have learned to see loss as a “side effect” or “byproduct” of being “given” the beautiful gift of someone to love so deeply. Instead of focusing on the loss part, I focus on the “given” part. I did not have to be “given” this pet or person in the first place. Instead of seeing it as something being taken away, I see the gift of what I got to have and hold so close.

Most of my pain when someone dies is not for me but for the one whose life was taken. But I see it the same way, life is a gift and that human or animal got to experience it even if just for a short while. Boo was happy and so well loved and always will be loved. Even though his life has ended, what matters is that he lived.

It was & is so devastating to receive the news about my sweet Boo boo but I’m so thankful I got to know and love him for the two years I did and my love for him will continue as long as I live.

His mommy & daddy wrote me a message and said they are thankful he had a nanny who loves him like my own.

This is the worst part of my job, having to say goodbye. Losing a furry client can be like losing my own. What is the difference? I come to know them and love them and take care of them. Sometimes I even have them overnight and sleep in bed with them, falling asleep with them at night and waking up with them in the morning, like living with them.

Sometimes the pain of losing them is or seems unbearable. And because there are so many of all different ages, sometimes we lose a couple so close together and I wonder what I got myself into taking a job like this.

Animals are so fragile and have naturally short lifespans so I don’t expect to have them around as long as I expect to have humans around (and I shouldn’t even really expect it of humans). In this way, it makes it not quite as traumatic or stressful as a human I know dying but it doesn’t lessen the pain of my loss either. Losing a pet is still like being gutted.

I’m so thankful not only that I get to love the furbabies I take care of but get to love their humans as well. People are always so very thankful to know that while they are away, their furkids are being loved & cared for so well. Even with the pain of loss, it is very worth it.

I knew Boo wasn’t doing very well. I always give the furbabies kisses goodbye but on my last day with Boo, I gave him one last extra kiss goodbye. I did not truly believe it would be the last day I saw him. I’m so thankful for that last kiss.

My heart goes out to Boo’s family.❤

My love goes out to all grieving the loss of a pet.❤ They are our family, our furever loves and not everyone understands our love for them and the profound pain of our loss when they must leave us.🐾❤

Much love,

Kim

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Pure Compassion

Random Act of Senseless Kindness – (song)

Today, while out for a walk with one of my furbabies, I saw a Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia truck outside of a child’s house. The medical professionals were providing hospital care to a very sick child at home instead of at an actual hospital. I saw oxygen equipment inside and other life-sustaining things. Instantly, I felt the sharp contrast of health & sickness, need & wholeness. Some of us are walking around in perfect or near perfect health while others are near death/extremely ill. Some get to have completely healthy children while others have the devastation of watching theirs struggle for breath. It’s just the way it is. I felt the “blessing” of my own perfect or seemingly perfect health but not in a “grateful” way like I’m thankful to be healthy because I’m reminded others are sick. I did not feel thankful for my own health at all (there wouldnt be anything wrong if i did though) but felt the “blessing” or benefit of it. I became acutely aware of my own excellent health and an overwhelming urge to share it with someone less healthy. I want to give whatever I can to a person like that sick kid.

While there was no gratitude, there was no guilt either. It’s no one’s fault that some are healthy while some are too sick to get out of bed. It’s no one’s fault that some moms or dads get to see their healthy kids running around playing while others have to watch the life draining out of their child’s body.

I found the suffering of that child and the child’s parents absolutely unbearable but felt no sorrow or even sympathy, just compassion and a strong motivation to act. What can I do for this sick child? Most likely nothing. I would give him/her my last breath if I could. That isn’t possible though. But what about others who are sick/dying? I have healthy blood which I can donate regularly. I may have two healthy kidneys, one of which can go to a person in need and will be soon if I am found to be qualified.
All this to say, if we have what someone else needs, why not share it? Why not give it away? It doesn’t matter if that person is a friend, family member, or stranger. We are all the same!
If someone needs our time, how about sharing a bit of it? If a person in line in front of us is a few cents short, how about sharing some of ours if we have it? Healthy blood? Maybe give some to the Red Cross or whatever blood bank is close? What do you have that you can share with someone in need? It can be anything! Material things, biological things, time/understanding/hugs…
We can find the suffering or need of others unbearable but in an action kind of way, not a way that breaks us or drags us down. What better way to give thanks for our own fortune, give back, pay it forward…than performing an act of kindness to someone else?
If we see someone who needs a kind of help that we cannot or don’t want to provide, we can use that as our inspiration to go help someone else who can be helped by us in a way that we want to help. Not everyone wants to give blood or kidneys but there may be something else we want to give if not that. Not everyone agrees that it’s a good idea to help homeless people by giving them money but there is always another thing we can do to help them or another person/animal…to help, to give to.

So how about it?! Let’s put compassion into action!

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever in the world you are!!❤

Xoxo Kim