Archives

List of Happy on the last day of May! πŸŒΈβ€οΈ

Processed with VSCO with preset

This is me in March 2020. I was super super happy (I’m happy in general when my depression isn’t flaring but sometimes I am in an especially joyful mood and was here 😁). You can see it all over my face! LoL

Anyway, here is my current list of Happy!

1.) My job! It’s very fulfilling and fun and joyful! I’m a pet nanny! 🐾😻🐢

2.) Iced green tea 🍡 matcha lattes! I love them and have been drinking them everyday. πŸ’š

3.) My body/health. It’s beautiful and energetic and holds me well. It allows me to do everything I want to do and recovers so quickly. I rarely get sick and when I get cut, my cuts heal super quickly. When I contracted the plague in 2020, I never even knew it because I never got sick! (I did thoroughly lose my taste/smell for two months, thought I had nerve damage) I only found out donating blood! The Red Cross told me I have the antibodies. I have a wicked immune system. I’m not thankful for not getting sick then (I was out in public walking around not knowing, though did not go near anyone and always had a mask on) but just goes to show how great my body is.

4.) My photography/glitch art hobby – It brings me joy and I’m good at it!

5.) My online friends! ❀️ Sometimes online friends are better than the in person ones(not that I currently have in person friends but hope to soon!).

6.) Movies! I love horror and comedies and especially love falling asleep watching horror ones!

7.) Acts of kindness πŸ’œ

8.) Philadelphia – My true love πŸ’™ I just love walking its streets all day & night. πŸŒ† πŸ™οΈ

9.) Oldies music! ❀️ The main music I listen to!

10.) My ability to experience compassion and sadness for others no matter how old it gets. I keep seeing people seeing they are too numbed by the violence all around us to care anymore. Sometimes that happens to me when I am severely depressed and especially when also extremely overworked along with it. Depression can burn out all our emotions when it’s extremely severe (it’s nothing at all to do with being a bad or uncaring person, can happen to anyone) but in general I can experience compassion and empathy and sadness and happiness for others.

11.) The birdsong on Spring & Summer nights. I can hear it now! πŸ’• Beautiful!

12.) That beautiful tender loving feeling when a depressive episode or wave is gradually lifting. I have always said that it’s almost worth it to be so sick because the feeling of it lifting is so beautiful and amazing. And I don’t use the word “amazing” loosely. ❀️

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever in the world you are and remember to look for the good even in the darkness. πŸ–€

Xoxo Kim β€οΈπŸ’•

Spring 🌼🌻🌸

This is an Instagram post of mine I’m sharing here!

“Spring offers us an intimate experience of paradox. Colorful new growth emerges to inspire us, seeming to flourish only in conditions which we begrudge: pummeling rain, persistently cool temps, buffeting winds. Our longing for relentless sunshine and warmth would abbreviate the glory of spring to a mere few days, not the season of slowly unfurling beauty we love to savor.

Life is predictably unpredictable, yet assuredly filled with what we will welcome and what we will shun. And it is in this mix of conditions and great mystery that we are made wiser, whole, and who we are. It is in both the roadblocks and open road. The storms and the clear skies. The moments we suffer and survive, and the moments we sparkle.” (Gratefulness.org)

This picture looks so Wintery. I’m walking around trying to get Springy pics and Spring them up even more, increasing the warmth and looking for filters that play up the summery/spring vibes but there are so so many bare trees around still and an unseasonably grey chill in the air each day. I took this picture today and it has strong Winter vibes. I was trying to think of how I can make it look more like Spring then came to the conclusion that it can’t be done; it is what it is and decided to roll with it and exaggerate the Winter vibes instead, deceasing the warmth and increasing the tint and going easy on the saturation so the blue stays a bit on the duller side instead of the bright blue of Spring/Summer. So here it is! Spring, just like life itself, is a beautiful mix of a little bit of everything, grey and color, hot, cold, beautiful, painful, snow, rain and shine…

It’s Spring where I am! I hope you are having a beautiful day wherever in the world you are! 🌸🌻🌼

Xoxo Kim

Belongingness ❀️

β€œWhen we feel alone, we belong to the grand communion of those who sometimes feel alone.” ❀️

We all always belong somewhere and are in a group with many others who have something in common with us even when it doesn’t feel that way. Whatever situation we are in, feeling we are experiencing, someone else is also. And we belong with them. I read this quote on gratefulness.org, a website I have been subscribed to for a couple years. They encourage us to practice gratefulness all year long and to summon feelings of belongingness with others, with the whole uni-verse. They send inspiring quotes to our inbox each day and have online events to participate in and send newsletters and essays on positive topics, each month.

I definitely recommend signing up for the newsletter and checking out their beautiful website! It’s a gentle safe space for all and a reprieve when we are overwhelmed with the world, life, anything going on that is stressful.

Whenever we feel alone in our situation or life in general, let us remember, we belong with the rest of the people who feel that way. ❀️

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever in the world you are!

Xoxo Kim

Happy Fall! πŸŽƒπŸ‘»πŸ‚πŸβ˜•πŸ–€

This is an old pic because I’m out of storage space now. I have to see how to upgrade and see when I can get the money for it. I have the free and limited version now. I will post something better soon. I love to post at least once each month. I used to post much more. It’s a bit off putting to not have room for updated pictures and not exactly sure what I have to do to get more storage space.

I have been in the Fall spirit and the air here in Philadelphia is getting cooler and crisp each day! Hopefully stays that way now! The Summer was excessively hot this year!

Anyway, I hope you are having a great day or night wherever in the world you are! πŸ‚πŸβ˜•πŸ‘»πŸŽƒπŸ–€

Xoxo Kim

Saturday Inspiration 🌞 πŸŒΈ

“An old farmer was once asked at a meeting of the Agricultural Congress to give his opinion on the best slope of land for the raising of a particular kind of fruit. ‘It does not make so much difference,’ said the old man, ‘about the slope of the land as the slope of the man.’ Many a farmer who has the right slope makes a good living and gets a competence on very poor soil, while the farmer who does not slope the right way barely exists upon the richest soil. Happiness does not depend so much upon our being favorably environed as upon the slope of our mind. It is not enough to extract happiness from ideal conditions; any one can do that. But it is the self-mastered, the self-poised soul who can get happiness out of the most inhospitable surroundings. ‘Paradise is here or nowhere. You must take your joy with you or you will never find it.’ The trouble with us is that we expect too much from the great happenings, the unusual things, and we overlook the common flowers on the path of life, from which we might abstract sweets, comforts, delights.”

Xoxo Kim πŸ’œ

Honoring the present moment πŸŒΈ

Processed with VSCO with preset

This is a beautiful blog and blog post by husband & wife, Marc & Angel. I love their wisdom. I recommend this blog post to all! I think it’s a reminder most of us can use now and again. πŸ’—πŸŒΈπŸ₯€βš˜πŸŒ±πŸŒ·πŸŒΌπŸŒ»πŸŒΊ


“Admitting the Hard Truth, and Embracing It

Where you are and what you’re doing at any given moment is absolutely essential.

Because it is the only moment guaranteed to you.

You are not on your way somewhere else.

You are not progressing to a more important time or place.

The present is not just a stepping-stone: It is the ultimate destination, and you have already arrived.

This moment is where your greatest power lies.

This moment is your life!

It might seem obvious, but, again, I forget.Β  And I know you do too.

All day, every day, many of us feel like the present isn’t enoughβ€”like our life isn’t worthy of our full presence.”

“What if we admitted that life is slipping away right now, and saw the fleeting time we have as enough, without needing to share it on social media or capture it or alter it in any way?”

This is true. I have found a balance of both, treasuring the present moment while also capturing its beauty to share with others. I take in the beauty and if it’s still there after basking in the presence of it, I take a pic. When I’m standing under a cherry 🌸 blossom tree and there’s a butterfly or sparrow on one of its branches, I first allow myself to be in the moment and if it’s all still the same a few moments later and I can get a picture, that’s amazing, and if not, that’s great too! But experiencing it, fully, is more important than getting a picture and interrupting the full presence. Sometimes I look out a window and see a beautiful scene with traffic and people and I have an urge to run and get my phone for a picture to capture it exactly as it is thwn before it changes but I know if I turn to get my phone, it won’t be the same when I get back, so I just stand and accept the beauty as it is in that fleeting moment without a picture.

One Hard Thing You Must Admit Before Your Life Slips Away by Marc & Angel

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever in the world you are! πŸ’—

Xoxo Kim

September SongπŸ’™

“Do you remember the 21st night of September?
Love was changin’ the minds of pretenders
While chasin’ the clouds away
Our hearts were ringin’ in the key that our souls were singin’
As we danced in the night, remember
How the stars stole the night away” πŸ’œπŸ–€πŸŽΆ

September Song – Earth, Wind, & Fire πŸ’™

What a great song! One of those pick me up, feel good songs to get us pumped! I am so happy for the end of Summer and beginning of Fall!! I’m ready for cool nights, pumpkins, pumpkin spice everything…which we have already been having! But will be so much more fun in October! It’s cooler than it usually is now in the City of Brotherly Love! 🧑 Anyone who needs a bit of cheer or just wants to add some more to your day or night, please listen to the above song! I listen to it like everyday! πŸ˜πŸ˜„πŸŽƒ

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever in the world you are!

xoxo Kim

Perfection πŸ’œ

I’m Beautiful – Bette Midler

“Well, I woke up one morning
Flossed my teeth and decided
‘Damn, I’m fierce!'”

There’s a movie I watched recently, called, “A Perfect Ending.” It’s about a wife who is not in a happy marriage with her husband. They were never truly happy together and she never felt passion in their relationship.
There are lots of sexual scenes in this movie, just in case anyone (sex repulsed asexuals, for example) needs a content warning. And some of the scenes seem to involve BDSM(very brief and hazy scenes if I remember correctly). There is nothing wrong with this; it’s all consenting adults. But anyone who has been traumatized in any way may be triggered by any scene that appears to be an assault scene even if it’s not. For anyone who doesn’t know, BDSM(Bondage, Discipline, Sadism, Masochism, Dominance, Submission ?) , is an activity that some people like to do where they tie each other up or one ties the other up, and scream and stuff, hitting and strangling may be involved, usually for sexual purposes, but some people like to leave the sexual aspect out and just hit/strangle each other and stuff(or one hits/strangles the other) just for thrills without the sexual aspect. lol It’s all consensual so it’s all good! If I was going to do that, I would leave the sexual out of it. lol They may be couples or groups of people involved. They can be any genders. If I was going to try it, I would choose a woman to be dominant over me. I could never hit her or strangle her even if she wanted it. I don’t have it in me. I don’t want to be hit either though. Or choked to death. lol But I would take it before I would dish it out. They have a safe word that gets the dominant person to stop the strangling and stuff. It’s something that is not “No, stop, don’t” because they scream those words to make it feel real. So when they really want someone to stop, they have a word they say. I don’t know much about BDSM at all, just a very limited idea. People into BDSM are just ordinary people with a kink; any kind of person can be into it.

Hopefully, I am not saying anything disrespectful or completely inaccurate since I am not very educated on the topic.

Some people get a thrill out of inflicting pain upon a consenting adult or being the target of pain inflicted by someone else. Like I said, nothing wrong with it; whatever floats your boat as long as it’s all consensual and adults. But someone who has actually been assaulted before or experienced any kind of trauma may be triggered seeing someone tied up and screaming even if the people like it and are consenting. Our brain can’t tell the difference. And it does look scary.

Anyway, this movie is not about that at all. There is just like one or two very brief scenes I think, involving it. So just a heads up!

And there is one scene I don’t understand. It is a flashback or memory that looks like an actual assault scene(not real, of course, but real in the movie, not BDSM) , just in case anyone needs a trigger warning.

The movie also involves terminal illness. When I struggled with health anxiety for six months in 2019, I could not watch movies involving cancer. My health anxiety started out as a horrific irrational (irrational because I obsessed almost every second of every day for six months and had no true reason to believe I was sick) fear of melanoma then turned to fear of all cancer in general. Someone in the movie has terminal cancer and dies at the end. It is made clear in the beginning that someone is sick and is running out of options but we do not know who until the end. We just hear a doctor talking and see pill bottles and a cemetery stone and a casket with flowers in different scenes. We also see a paper saying someone has malignant melanoma that has metastatized(sp?? I dont care to look up the spelling) and is inoperable.

I won’t give away any very big spoilers but if anyone wants to watch without knowing anymore details, skip this post for now!

Mini spoiler warning
.
.
.
The wife, who is very rich, financially, mentions to her friends that she is not and has never really been in love with her husband of many years. She only married him because she was a single mom of a toddler and wanted security. She mentions that she wants passion like they have in their relationship and sexual pleasure, which she has never experienced. So they suggest that she gets a callgirl and hooks up with her. They think maybe she needs a woman; they are certain that women are better lovers than men. lol (I wouldn’t know but sure they are right! 🀣😁)

(Also, I know not everyone is either a man or a woman – there are some who are non-binary or a combination of male, female, or other…In the movie they were talking about men & women though so that is why I only mentioned them. I’m not excluding anyone)

So she gets involved with a much younger and stunningly beautiful callgirl. At first it’s meant to be strictly bussiness. The woman pays the other woman for sexual pleasure and the other woman gladly accepts the money. But they soon fall madly in love with each other and it’s no longer about business. The callgirl, Paris, quits taking on other clients and wants to stay with this one woman, whose husband has no idea she is cheating. Her husband has never tried to make her feel loved and cares much about appearance and perfection. The wife has felt very insecure for years.

The younger woman, Paris, is very loving and wise.
There is a scene where the two women are laying in bed together and the young woman is stroking the older woman’s skin. She reaches for her stomach and Rebecca, the other woman, stops her.
This is a brief and beautiful conversation they have during this scene, packed with wisdom.
Rebecca: “Don’t; I hate my stomach. I haven’t been to the gym in way too long. I used to have a pretty good body before kids and menopause. I never looked like you though. Wow.
Paris: (Referring to her own physical beauty) This, this doesn’t mean anything. Rebecca.
Rebecca: I hate that I did this. (I think she’s referring to a body modification, maybe implants, but not sure)
Paris: Why did you?
Rebecca: It was a birthday present from Mason. He loves perfection. It’s sort of the one thing we have in common. I’ve spent my whole life trying to be perfect. I never felt good enough, or thin enough, pretty enough, smart enough.
Paris: All of the things that make us not perfect are what make us so perfectly who we are. That’s who you are, Rebecca. Perfection.

Isn’t this beautiful? A great reminder to us all!

It’s a sweet & beautiful love story if you ignore the fact that she’s cheating on her husband. lol Not that this makes it ok but her husband is not the best; he’s not very loving to her; their marriage is stagnant, and worst of all, he does not think of or treat her daughter as his own even though he brought her up since she was a baby. He only regards the younger brothers as his since they are biologically his. I would leave him just for that. If someone is important to us, I believe their kids should be too. If I have a friend with kids, I love her kids automatically. Also, I don’t have much experience with human children but I cannot imagine bringing up a child and not loving the child like my own and regarding the child like my own. I’m a pet nanny and I love all the furballs like my own n they are not mine in any way at all.

I love the character, Paris, the callgirl. She’s intelligent and wise and sexy and confident. She’s also compassionate. She experienced something traumatic and devastating, previously. Some may have a serious issue with her since a married woman is cheating on her husband with Paris and Paris knows she is married. But if you can forget that little detail, you may just fall in love with her. lol 😍

Whenever I watch a movie that is especially packed with wisdom or has a scene in it with a wise or beautiful message, I love to share!
So the message here is we are all beautiful, especially because of our flaws and perfect because of our imperfections. And while the physical beauty of a person is pleasing, it is not important and actually means nothing.

This does not mean not to get all dolled up or cosmetic surgery if we want and not take pleasure in someone else’s or our own beauty, just that there are more important aspects of a person. Of course beauty, hair, makeup salons are all good! I love looking at beautiful women and I follow many fashion and makeup accounts! But I know a good personality, a loving heart, is more pleasing than a pretty face or banging body. Also, more potential to be longer lasting.

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever in the world you are! ❀

Xoxo Kim