Tag Archive | chances

30 Days of Photos – Day 7 {where the road will lead you} <3

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“you’ll never see exactly where
the road will lead you
and when it comes to love
you gamble when you need to
you’ll maybe break your heart
on one unlucky throw
but then again you never know” ~ Ringo Starr ❤

Day 7 for the 30 day photo challenge, which for me was August 7th, it is intended for us to get a picture of a road or path. 

That's one of my favorite things to get pictures of! Especially Cobblestone streets here in Philadelphia! ❤

These pictures were taken August 7th.

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And this one was taken a couple months ago.

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This is the same picture but with a vintage effect.

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Sign up for the free e-course here.

You’ll Never Know – Ringo Starr mobile

You’ll Never Know – Ringo Starr – Desktop

Much love to you!

❤ 😀

xoxo Kim ❤

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Love’s Power <3

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“I have wept in the night for the shortness of sight
That to someone’s need made me blind;
But I never have yet felt a tinge of regret 
For being a little too kind.” ~ Unknown 

I work at a store. It’s window service and we sell ice cream and water ice all year long. We make ice cream sundaes, banana splits, gelatis, and sell soda, candy, and some other things.

I get tips a lot. When someone gives me a tip it’s often one or two dollars or some change. On seldom occasions someone gives me a big tip. The biggest tip given to me at once 
was around eighteen dollars. That is very rare. I’m always very grateful for tips no matter how much or how little the money is, and the person who gives me one, more for the kindness than the money itself. People don’t have to give me a tip but many do, out of the kindness and goodness of their hearts.

One of the most inspiring tips I ever received is 25 cents. 

One busy night at work I saw an old man in line. I love old people. I think they’re cute and am deeply inspired by their deep wrinkles, graying or white hair, their slow movements, laugh lines, their aches and pains, the gnarled joints that reveal strength, endurance, and determination, passion, longing, and vitality entrapped in deteriorating eyes and ears but set free through the power of Touch, their wisdom, that all reveal an undying desire and will to live and survive, to keep going, to push through it all with that sparkle still in their eyes, the smile that never fades, the long life of happiness, heartache, joy, and battles and beauty they have been blessed to know.

The man was looking to his side, smiling warmly. I felt an instant warm affection for him. I saw deep wrinkles around his eyes and mouth, white hair on his balding head. His arthritic fingers had difficulty moving, grasping and his posture wasn’t straight. But he still has something to smile about.

Then I saw what he was smiling at. His grandson. An adorable little boy.

The little boy also had a radiant smile. A joyous smile that seemed to light the night.

He was so eager to order his own food. Usually when kids come with adults the adult orders the food for them. But occasionally a child wants to ask for her/his own.

This little boy, probably around ten years old, was so happy to ask for his own food. A “special needs” child, it was somewhat challenging for him but he attempted, succeeded, and was so proud. He asked for food that costs $2.50. 

I spoke to and smiled at him encouragingly to show him how well he was doing. And his grandfather stood back and watched proudly.

The little boy handed me three dollars and I gave him his fifty cents back. He stepped aside to put mustard on his food and let the others in line come up to order. When I went back to the window the little boy said to me, “Excuse me, do you have a tip cup?” 

I gladly accept tips but I don’t ask for or expect them and never put a tip cup out. One of the girls I work with does though and her tip cup was on the shelf next to the window since it was just me working that night, so I put it out the window when he asked and he took one of his quarters he got as change, smiled at me, and dropped it in. Again, he was so happy and proud. What a kind and thoughtful 
little boy. Full of courage and love.
Glowing with confidence.

My heart welled up with love and gratitude and inspiration.

I said “Thank You so much!!” and smiled and he smiled that unstoppable smile and joyfully replied “You’re welcome!” and they walked away hand in hand. A little boy and an old man.

This little boy doesn’t let a disability stop him or a struggle or a challenging circumstance. He bravely speaks up, exercises his independence, and reaches out in love.

The quarter he gave me is a beautiful, tangible reminder of love, strength, and courage.

I love to help people. It’s one of my favorite things. I’m a very shy girl, sometimes a little bit too reserved, and sometimes I let it limit me. 
And sometimes I let my depressive disorder limit me.
Sometimes when I’m deeply depressed I let myself sink and not be the best me I can be. I submerge into a deep abyss and stop everything. Stop writing and reading and sharing uplifting quotes and ideas, stop smiling, repressing all of my creative urges…
And there have been occasions I was in a position to reach out and help someone or speak up or even just make eye contact with and smile at a stranger or someone, to give all of myself, to express my love and compassion and instead, I held back, stood back or looked away in fear. 

Fear of what I would look like to others, fear of not being good enough, fear of trying to help but actually making something worse, fear of making a misjudgment and someone really did not need my help or want my kindness, fear of messing up in front of someone and looking silly not in a good way, fear of someone negatively judging me for some reason, fear of coming off as useless or rambling, fear of being misunderstood, fear of someone seeing me truly, seeing me for me and not liking it, the real me, fear of someone not “properly” receiving whatever I wanted to offer, fear. 

Fear.

I let it interfere with my loving compassion, the tenderness that my heart longs to lavish on the world, I let it interfere with my desire, my longing to reach out and embrace, console, heal, and love.  

I don’t always let it stop me. But too often, I do. 

And a little boy reminded me of that one summer night when he reached out through the loving kindness in his heart and showed me love even though it was a challenge for him.

He was bold enough to ask for what he wanted. And brave enough to love.

And through his own love, kindness, and courage, he was able to encourage and teach/remind me of a lesson. Love is more powerful than fear. More powerful than pain of any kind.
It’s more powerful than any struggle or challenge or disability. It’s more powerful than pain and despair, depression and the desire to give up. If we summon the love in us, it’s more powerful than anything else.

“Livin’ might mean takin’ chances but they’re worth takin'” ~ LeeAnn Womack

The only true disability is the choice to let fear or other unpleasant emotions stand in the way of love. And that disability can be corrected.

My love, my kindness, my willingness to help will not always be gratefully appreciated. I will experience forms of rejection, ridicule, apathy, people who see me for me and don’t like what they see. I will be misjudged now and again. I will be disliked, not appreciated, ignored. And that’s ok. I don’t love merely to be loved in return, to be appreciated and cherished. Those are amazing things to have but I don’t expect or demand them in return for my love, compassion, and kindness.

If someone does not receive my kindness and love the way I intend, it’s ok. It can be painful but it’s worth the risk. I will move forward and love some more. There will always be someone who does not care for my help, love, friendship, and kindness and there will always be someone who does. I won’t always know for sure who will open up and receive my love and compassion and who will not.

“Lovin’ might be a mistake but it’s worth makin'” ~ LeeAnn Womack 

But I won’t stand back in fear of those who won’t. I will love again and again. And if it touches someone for the better, my dream is fulfilled. If it’s denied, ignored, ridiculed, criticized, and rejected, I will go on loving. My dream is still fulfilled. My dream to BE a being of love. To be an example of love. Love for others and the self. Love for people I don’t know personally and for people I do. Love for the most loving and beautiful people. Love for difficult people and ones who just don’t care. Love for those who aren’t easy to love.

“I’ve got a song
And I carry it with me and I sing it loud
If it gets me nowhere, I’ll go there proud.” ~ Jim Croce 

Love can be an emotion, an affective feeling and it can be a verb, an action, an expression. Whenever we reach out to make the world a better place or touch someone’s life for the better with the light of our own lives, we reach out in love. 

I hope you, too, will reach out in Love if it’s your true passion. If Love is your Way I hope you honor it and love. Love any way you can. Writing positive and uplifting comments to people on blogs, statuses, videos, encouraging your friends and family unconditionally, volunteering to help people or animals, being a loving mother or father or friend, working to help people, giving to those in need, smiling sweetly at people, helping homeless animals or people, sharing uplifting quotes, a warm hug or friendly hello, providing warmth and light to those in the cold darkness…you don’t need money or a specific job or even a lot of time. You can incorporate love into your every day. The most simple acts of kindness are enough to light up the world.
Even when you struggle to move your tongue, I hope you speak in Love.  And when your hands tremble in fear, I hope you still reach out to touch. When your heart is broken and scarred I hope it continues to guide you, anyway. And when you’re lonely and your arms are holding yourself tightly in your sorrow and despair, I hope you find the strength to let go and embrace another, someone else who may need your loving arms, your broken heart, your deep understanding. When your eyes are filled with tears and pain, I hope you find the courage still, to look deeply into someone else’s and find something that resonates with you, look into someone else’s eyes and see a reflection of yourself.

“At the end of the day, it’s not about what you have or even what you’ve accomplished. It’s about what you’ve done with those accomplishments. It’s
about who you’ve lifted up, who you’ve made better. It’s about what you’ve given back.”

I am forever grateful to all of those who remind me. Remind me to love, to take risks, to honor me, even though it won’t always be easy.

“Everyone needs reminders that the fact of their being on this earth is important and that each life changes everything.”
~Marge Kennedy

I heard and read the word “encourage” my whole life and knew what it means for about as long as I can remember. It means to bring some kind of support to someone, to help give someone a push to keep going. But until now I never realized the word “courage” in it and the “en” in front of the “courage.” To inspire courage. Like the word “enable.” able=ability “en” to empower or allow. To help someone find the courage that dwells deep within.

It’s an interesting revelation.

We have courage or potential for courage deep within us already and someone can help coax it out for us, even a young child.

We often think about what we can teach and remind children but let us stop for a minute and think what a child can remind and teach us.

Xoxo Kim

Tomorrow Is Today <3

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(this isn’t my photo – I found it on Google images)

One of my favorite singers is Billy Joel. I love, love, LOVE his songs. Billy Joel is a very loving person, so many of his songs are about love, often romantic love. Not all of them are happy love songs but they’re still beautiful. Some seem to be about rejection or unrequited love.

His song, released in 1971, “Tomorrow Is Today” is his real suicide note that he decided to put music to and turn into a song.

YouTube video for the song:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&persist_app=1&v=b9WAQHn_gmo

 It’s a beautiful song riddled with his pain and despair. He attempted suicide and fortunately lived. This song “Tomorrow Is Today” is about how every day is the same, nothing new, nothing good so there’s no point in living. I understand this deeply. There are many days I have felt every day is the same, bland, blah, full of pain, anguish, misery and so what’s the point. But there are many days I felt every day is the same but loved this beautiful life for it. Everyday is full of beauty, love, simplicity and I can’t wait to wake up each day to it. When every day is packed with joy, love, and beauty, it doesn’t matter if each day is identical. It’s enough. 

“I don’t care to know the hour
‘Cause it’s passing anyway
I don’t have to see tomorrow
‘Cause I saw it yesterday”

This line:

“Still I’m waiting for the morning
But it feels so far away
And you don’t need the love I’m giving
So tomorrow is today.”

Sometimes it seems we wait and wait and wait for something that just won’t come. It’s like an eternity away.

‘And you don’t need the love I’m giving so tomorrow is today.’

I know the feeling, as I think many/most people do, of wanting something I don’t have, attempting something and not succeeding, loving someone who doesn’t love me back…

Billy Joel sings that someone doesn’t need the love he’s giving and so tomorrow is today. Everyday is bland or painful because the target of his love shows no interest in receiving or returning it. This can feel so lifeless.

I think this is a common problem so many people know. Giving and giving only to not receive any appreciation. Loving and loving and not being loved in return. Wanting and wanting but never getting.

And while these things are excruciatingly painful, we can learn to cope with them and realize that we don’t need a specific target for our love. And we don’t need to give merely to receive. The mere feeling and act of giving and loving is satisfaction enough, rewarding enough with no expectation of getting something more for it. We can bask in and soak in the love deep inside, extending it to everything and everyone we can. It’s amazing to have specific people and things to love. But those aren’t the only things to love.

Just feel the love coursing through your veins every second of every day for each moment, even without a specific object. It’s just there. Living and breathing in you. Love for all living sentient beings, for this life itself, for the uncertainty and the beauty surrounding you. For heartbreak, hope & healing. This feeling of immense love can be masked by other feelings, painful emotions and thoughts, at some points but it can be summoned to the consciousness again and again.

We don’t need gratitude for our gratitude or appreciation for our appreciation, love for our love. We don’t need to receive to give.

The person Billy Joel loves in his song may not love him back or show any sense of reception of his love but he can take all that love he has and put it out into the world, lavish it on all those who do need it. Someone out there somewhere needs his love. He can turn it on himself and bask in the beauty of his own love. And it doesn’t matter if that person needs his love or not, he can still go on loving her/him….
It can be painful but also beautiful.
Rejection hurts. Abandonment hurts. Not being known hurts.
But Love heals.

It’s incredible that tomorrow is today and yesterday is tomorrow when every day is soaked in Love.

Loving someone who doesn’t know you exist or doesn’t return your love, wanting something you never seem to get, giving and not receiving can contribute to someone wanting to just lay down and die but we can take that loving energy and reverse it, let it fuel us to live instead. To live more, love more, give more. Shifting our perspective to view loving as more important than being loved, giving is more important than receiving, and appreciating is more important than being appreciated. 

Receiving love and appreciation are also great but if you don’t feel loved or appreciated for whatever reason you don’t have to lay down and die. Let your own love revive you and breathe in you.

When there’s so much deep love just bubbling in my core it’s often hard to feel anything else. It’s hard to loathe anyone or wish bad things for anyone, even those who do things I don’t like. 

I can still stand up for and speak out against things, constructively criticize things, disagree with and debate while still feeling/expressing love.

“Oh, my. Goin’ to the river
Gonna take a ride and the Lord will deliver me
Made my bed, now I’m gonna lie in it
If you don’t come, I’m sure gonna die in it
Too late. Too much given
I’ve seen a lot of life and I’m damn sick of livin’ it
I keep hopin’ that you will pass my way”

I get the feeling that when he falls hard for someone, gives someone all his love and it’s not returned to him, it really takes a toll, it depresses him, breaks him, even to the point of suicide contemplation and attempts. When he can’t have someone he wants in his life it drives him to just fall to pieces. But as I mentioned when this happens, we can take our love and direct it at ourselves and the universe as a whole. This is so healing. It won’t take away our pain completely or make us forget the ones we love who abandon or reject us but it can help us heal while helping others be/feel loved.

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You can’t give too much love.

Sometimes people have an interest in developing a platonic friendship with someone who has no interest in being friends with the person, sometimes it’s a romantic love interest not returned, some days it’s doing extra work for someone who couldn’t seem to care less, writing blog posts or creating YouTube videos or posts on any social media that don’t get much attention or get negative attention, applying for schools or jobs and being rejected….all of these things can be devastating to different people in different ways, to different depths and degrees.

But don’t give up! Whatever you do, say, however you love will resonate with someone, somewhere,  someday, somehow. Maybe not today or tomorrow but someday. Hold on.  

Someone out there can and will love someone just like you and needs, desires, craves exactly what you have to offer whether it’s the kind of friend you can be, the kind of lover you are, the abilities and qualities you have that are perfect for some jobs, your writing, your ideas, your points of views and angles of looking at things. 

Your beauty is valuable to this world.

And someone out there somewhere needs you.

We all have different kinds of personalities that are compatible
With and appealing to certain other personalities but not other ones.

Some people will love you, want you, crave you, need you and some won’t. That goes for all of us.

“And some day if your dreams are leavin’ you
I’ll still believe in you.” 

This is a perfect example of love and loving someone unconditionally,  even when that someone may not love us back.

We can still believe in that person and wish the best for him/her. If I truly love someone I want the person to be happy even when I’m not the reason for that happiness. I will still believe in the person even when that person doesn’t believe in or love me Or her/himself.

As painful as it can be, it’s also quite liberating.

In 1985, Billy Joel had another song released  called “You’re Only Human (Second Wind).”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&persist_app=1&v=3AG_ororx8E

It was written to remind people to never give up, that suicide isn’t the answer. Ever. It’s never the way to go. Sooner or later you’ll get your second wind. You may want to lay down and die now but later things will start looking up and it’s worth waiting for.

“It’s not always easy to be living in this world of pain
You’re gonna be crashing into stone walls again and again
It’s alright, it’s alright
Though you feel your heart break
You’re only human, you’re gonna have to deal with heartache.”

As long as we live we will experience pain, heartbreak, loneliness….and that’s ok.

“You’ve been keeping to yourself these days
Cause you’re thinking everything’s gone wrong
Sometimes you just want to lay down and die
That emotion can be so strong
But hold on
Till that old second wind comes along.”

No matter how bad things get or feel, how much it hurts, how much you want to die, things can get better if you just hold on.

Hold on til that second wind comes along!

Xoxo Kim

P.s. It’s so weird I’m listening to my old memory card with different songs on it and I forgot what songs are on it and as I was writing that above paragraph, the song randomly came on! The “You’re Only Human (Second Wind)” song by Billy Joel!! 😀

Love Out Loud

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“Always leave the world a little better than you found it.”

To me, one of the greatest joys of living is helping others, making things go more smoothly for anyone I can.

There are many simple ways to help people all throughout everyday. Simple things that have a great impact. We don’t have to have a certain job or anything to help out. There are endless opportunities in every day. ❤

There are ways to help people that will go unnoticed by everyone but the person helping but if these simple things are not done, it will be noticed.

You may think something along the lines of “Why even do this when no one will even know? Not even the person being helped will know!” But if you don’t, people will be affected in an unpleasant way.

For example, seeing milkcrates or boxes in the middle of a street with no one else around. If you move those crates or boxes away so people in cars can more easily drive by, there’s a very good chance no one will ever know someone was kind enough to move them. They never knew they were there in the first place. They’ll just drive by without ever knowing. They can’t bask in the joy or gratitude of knowing someone helped them because they don’t know someone did help them.

But if we don’t help by moving those boxes or crates, they will know they’re there. They’ll have to stop, get out of their cars and move them themselves. Or worse, they’ll crash into them, not paying attention. They will feel the impact of the hassle they have encountered. So there really is a purpose to doing simple things that will go unnoticed when the tasks are completed. If they’re not completed, they will be noticed so why not make things easier for people in general whenever we can?! We’re generally under no obligation to help make things easier for people, and if you don’t it doesn’t make you a horrible person, but it’s still fantastic to help anyway!

I don’t need credit or to be paid back in anyway whatsoever. Helping people is enough. I was thinking about this concept one day at work, recently, and it always brings me joy to think this way but I’m always unprepared for the immensity and the depth of the joy that hits me and flows through me, tingling in my bones when I think this way. It’s breathtaking.

The thrill of all the possibilities we have, all the chances we can take, to help anyone we
 can in big and small ways. It’s exhilarating!

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Even if it’s just eye contact with and a pleasant smile to a stranger, giving someone your seat on a bus or a waiting room, not judging distressed and overworked parents with screaming kids in a crowded place when everyone else is repulsed and giving them disgusted looks, actively listening to someone with a genuine interest in understanding instead of just listening to deliver an appropriate sounding response, being a loyal friend, adopting a pet and giving him/her a loving furever home, paying for someone in back or in front of you in line at a store, writing little love notes with inspirational quotes or messages and leaving them in random places for anyone to find, being extra patient with the stressed cashiers in busy stores, holding your tongue when you feel like lashing out at someone, trying hard to understand someone else’s situation that you never experienced for yourself, the opportunities are infinite.

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Sometimes I think of all the ways I may have been helped by some kind stranger through the years, never even knowing it, never saying thank you because I never had the chance. All the puddles I never sat in on busses because someone dried them before I had a chance to sit in them, all the gum that never got stuck in my long hair on public seats somewhere because someone cared to remove it before someone’s hair or clothes got destroyed, the objects that were removed out of aisles of stores, off of pavements, and out of streets before I tripped over them not paying attention, I think of the houses and stores that never got broken into, the people who never got snatched off the streets because someone cared enough to call the police and scare the person away/catch the suspicious person.

I remember one day I was texting while crossing a bus terminal to get onto a bus and stepped in front of another bus, speeding at me, not paying attention. It was more than just a “close call.” I was nearly hit. And so was one of the men who saved me. The bus driver hit the horn but couldn’t stop fast enough. And it was speeding fast. Two men yelled and risked their own lives to save mine. Men I never saw before that day and never saw again. They did not know each other or me. They saw it turn and coming my way when I did not. They both jumped out into the street, one pulling me, the other pushing me. The one actually put his body in front of the bus to push me out of the way, almost falling on top of me to get us both out of the way. If they weren’t at the bus stop that day I probably wouldn’t be here today. Or I would be physically damaged. They did not know who I am but they know that I’m someone. They never knew my name, my values or opinions, my story, my personality, my interests or anything about me other than the fact that I exist. But they clearly valued my life that moment as much as their own, disregarding anything else about me.

Because of that I never look at my phone or anything while crossing a street. Ever. Not once since that day a few years ago, have I even briefly glanced at my phone while crossing even small streets with no traffic. Even when I’m really into something on my phone when I get to a street I act like the phone doesn’t exist. I honor their heroic act.

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While I felt immense gratitude I was mortified. It was so stupid to be texting while crossing a busy street/bus terminal. I put not only myself in danger but others. On the bus that day it’s all people could talk about, how lucky I was, how close it was to a tragedy…Luckily no one said out loud how stupid I was. I couldn’t get off that bus fast enough.

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(this is the bus stop But on a different day lol! I was looking for a pretty picture to put here and coincidentally this is one of the first to show up on my phone which is broke so all my pics aren’t showing up…)

But if I wasn’t texting that day crossing into the street, I would still be doing stuff like that days after that and maybe another day I wouldn’t have been so lucky to have two Earth angels so close to me. So they saved my life that day and possibly days after. I think of all the days I wasn’t hit by a bus because two heroic men taught me a great lesson. Texting while crossing or driving is a dumb thing to do. It’s dangerous. It’s deadly. To the one texting and the ones around that person.

There are so many blessings we don’t even realize we are living or have lived because they’re the things that go unnoticed when they are done by someone but their absence would be noticed if they weren’t done by someone.

We can give thanks to and for all the Earth angels and heroes out there and those no longer with us by paying it forward. Always being the one to leave the world a little better than we found it. By loving out loud.

Xoxo Kim


Lovin’ might be a mistake but it’s worth makin’

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Risk
“To laugh is to risk appearing the fool. 
To weep is to risk being called sentimental.
To reach out to another is to risk involvement.
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self.
To place your ideas, your dreams in front of a crowd is to risk being called naive.
To love is to risk not being loved in return.
To live is to risk dying.
To hope is to risk despair, to try is to risk failure.
But risks must be taken because the greates risk in life is to risk nothing. The person who risks nothing does nothing, has nothing, and becomes nothing.
He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love and live. Chained by his certitudes, he is a slave, he has forfeited his freedom.
Only the person who risks is truly free.”
-Janet Rand

I came across this poem recently and I agree with almost the entire thing. The only part I do not agree with is the “…and becomes nothing.” part. I get the gist of it but I would never call someone “nothing” no matter what. We are all someone.  

I always say that I find inspiration and beauty everywhere. And it’s true.   Many things inspire me deeply. But sometimes, on more seldom occasions, I find something that pulls on my insides. Like this poem. It’s a physical tugging feeling inside, like it’s literally pulling on me. These words speak to me so much and I know they will inspire me and guide me in all the days to come. Moments when I’m tempted to hold back. Hesitate and contemplate not reaching out or speaking up or not allowing myself to fill with hope out of fear of losing, falling, rejection, stumbling, someone not appreciating something I say/do……

But I will keep remembering to reach out anyway, love deeply anyway, be happy anyway, hope anyway, risk stumbling and falling, risk rejection, risk the indifference of someone I have much gratitude for, risk appearing stupid in front of others, risk people using things against me later that I reveal now, risk it all for love. Love for others, for the world, for myself, for life, for raw honesty and openness and sharing….

Risk it all to live deeply and truly. Risk it all to be fully alive. Pain, indifference, rejection, painful criticism, appearing to be something negative to others…all of these things feel unpleasant but they are part of living truly and deeply. They are sometimes the result of taking risks and I believe they are worth it.

We can close ourselves off to the world, shut up and shut down to avoid loss and rejection and other unpleasant things and we may succeed in that for the most part. But we will also succeed in not getting the most out of the gift of life. If we don’t allow ourselves to experience the depth of relationships with ourselves, others, life, and the world, we’re less likely to feel true loss and rejection but also less likely to experience the joy and depth of true love. If we don’t reach out to people we can often avoid rejection but at the price of avoiding true connection. Is it really worth the cost?

If we don’t share our opinions and stories with others, we will be less likely to be ridiculed and criticized but also be less likely to inspire and impact people and allow people to get to know us.  

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Repressing love, emotions, and our true selves accomplishes those things but at the price of not being fully alive.

And reminders now and then like this poem are so pleasant and joyous.

The painful struggles that come with taking risks can be used to our advantage. To help us grow and learn, teach others, and identify with others.

” Livin’ might mean takin’ chances but they’re worth takin’,
Lovin’ might be a mistake but it’s worth makin'” ~ LeeAnn Womack

Xoxo Kim

Perfectly Imperfect <3

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Everyone must know by now, of my love for Alice Cooper.   And here is another post dedicated to him and one of his lovely songs.

It’s called “Perfect.”.  He is singing about how his girl is not perfect but to him, she is.   She doesn’t have many skills, she can’t sing or dance.   He acknowledges this and loves her just the same.

She’s an overnight sensation
In the mirror on her wall
She gets a standing ovation
At every shower curtain call

And she becomes a pop star
In the safety of her car
And then she falls to pieces
At the karaoke bar”

It’s all good when no one is watching and the lights are low but as soon as she has a large audience, look out! 😉 lol

And she’s perfect
Until the lights go on
And then it all goes wrong
‘Cause now she’s not so perfect

She can shake it just like J-Lo
When the bedroom lights go down
But when she hits the dance floor
She’s a hip-hop hippo clown.”

Lmao this is hilarious.

She’s not perfect
She’s all mine
She can’t sing or dance
She ain’t got a chance
But baby, I don’t mind

She’s perfect
Oh, she’s perfect
Ah, she’s so perfect
You know, she’s so perfect
Ah, ah, ah

Sing baby
Dance, dance, dance
You got it
Shake it down
Oh, that’s bad
That’s bad
I love you baby
That’s just awful
You got it
You got it”

Just beautiful! 

Not only is this just a great song with a sweet tune, it conveys a perfect message. Not everyone will be perfect but we can love and accept those people just as they are.  Look how encouraging Alice is.  He’s supporting her every move even though she sucks at it.  Lol

All the people we know and love probably have some “imperfection” but so what?  We can love, cherish, and accept, always.

And if you can’t sing or dance, sing and dance anyway!  Singing and dancing like an idiot, it’s fun!! ;-D

It it’s worth doing, it’s worth doing badly.

Here is the mobile link to the song which may or may not work for you, I’m using my phone.

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RAZF4SKDLh0&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DRAZF4SKDLh0&sa=X&ei=2IxVUoj-Cbb94AOvoICADw&ved=0CAsQqwQ

Xoxo Kim

An Inspiring Conversation

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” I choose to FIGHT BACK! I choose to RISE, not fall! I choose to LIVE, not die! And I know, I know that what’s within me is also WITHIN YOU. “~Mayor John Pappas (City Hall, 1996)

About a year ago, I had a conversation with someone at work one night. At first, I found this conversation to be very unpleasant but shortly after the conversation ended, I felt energized, inspired, uplifted, and so hopeful.

This conversation is one of the things which has had the greatest, positive impact on me in my journey to recover my suicidal depression.

A person was talking to me about drug addiction and people who struggle and have struggled with addiction. She had a very negative view of people who have suffered substance addiction, even the ones who have overcome it and no longer consume illegal/recreational drugs.

She basically held the view that drug addicted people are lost causes who are bound to go nowhere in life. And even when they recover or heal, they will always be “druggies”. “Druggies” who even after recovering will never find redemption or worth.

I couldn’t have disagreed with this girl more. I see so much potential and hope and light in almost everyone I look at. People are remarkably strong and resilient and can overcome and move forward even when it’s hard. Even when it’s painful and all seems hopeless. Even when it seems impossible. Even when it’s all just so dark. 

There can always be light. When I look at a person, even a troubled, difficult, broken person with great obstacles and challenges, I don’t see an addiction or an illness or a mere label or a “lost cause”. I see a person.   A light. Possibility and hope. Hope for healing.   Hope for change.  

Everyone has something to contribute to this world and everyone around us whether or not they realize it and even when it feels impossible.   You may feel so empty, so broken, so devoid of life, so hopeless but you are not beyond healing or hope or love.

A person who has struggled with addiction and has overcome or healed that addiction and no longer takes drugs/alcohol has acheived an incredible accomplishment. It takes great strength and courage and dedication to pick up the broken pieces, the shattered parts of self and put them together again and become whole. There may always be scars, cracks, breaks, pain..but it’s possible to move forward and find true happiness, true joy in existence.

Why judge someone negatively for previous mistakes or a health condition or a choice that got out of control?

I have never struggled with addiction of any sort and cannot possibly know what it’s like.   All I can know is that it is painful, devastating, heartbreaking and difficult for the person who is addicted and everyone around that person and that it IS possible, with help & support of various kinds, to get better enough to live and be happy living. Whether or not the person is completely recovered with no more urges or still has urges that are difficult to resist. Even someone who relapses now and then.

It’s not always easy for an addicted person to know this or to ask for help or to not relapse.   And people struggling with addiction deserve empathy, understanding, compassion, love, encouragement.   They aren’t monsters. Many of them may steal and assault people and become unrecognizable to those who knew them before the tragedy of addiction but they are not all bad people . Underneath the devastation and the addiction is an amazing person who can find hope and healing.

After this girl I had the conversation with left me that night I started to think about our contrasting views. She viewed people who struggle with addiction as some of the lowest people on Earth, worthless, bad, taking up space in a world they don’t deserve.

And I view them as the people they are. Worthy of love, empathy, care, acceptance, compassion…

And I started to think about how we need more people in this world with my view. We need people with better understanding and compassion.

I thought of my own struggle with suicidal depression, which back then, a year ago, was not as healed as it is today, right now.

I thought of all the moments I wanted to kill myself in this life, feeling as if I had nothing to live for and never ever would , as if I was worthless, empty, nothing, as if the pain was just too much to bear, weighing too heavy on my life, to go on.

And I realized if I ever kill myself, I kill my compassion for others, my love, my empathy, my understanding, my acceptance, my open mindedness. If I kill myself, I kill all the chances I will ever have to help another, before those chances even begin. If I kill me, I kill the opportunity to tell someone s/he is not a lost cause, not an addiction, not a loser, not deserving of callousness and abusive insults and cruelty. I kill the chance to tell someone there is hope.

I’m not an expert on addiction. I don’t know exactly how to handle an addicted person, especially one who is acting out. They may need firmness every now and then and not all sap and gentleness, I don’t know. But that’s not my point anyway; my point is that we need more people with compassion and positive views of troubled people. We need people who will not destructively criticize and tell people there’s no hope for them.

This goes for any troubled person or anyone who has made mistakes with serious consequences, not just addicted people. 

And that if you ever kill yourself, you kill every positive aspect of yourself, your opportunity to eventually be fulfilled and healed and find or create a sense of purpose, and your opportunity for growth and your opportunity to impact the world and maybe even just one life for the better.

You’re under no obligation to live for others, it’s yourself you should live for. But there are people who need you to live, you may not have met them yet and maybe won’t meet them for many years, maybe you never will but your life will somehow touch theirs.  Someone, somewhere needs YOU to LIVE.  And eventually you will find or create a sense of purpose for your own existence.

Live for yourself and your own empathy and care and love. And live for all of your good qualities and possibilities.

I vowed to myself that night after that conversation which at first I believed to be unpleasant, that I will never take my own life. We should all live for ourselves. But when I used to get suicidal, I did not want to live for me. I saw nothing in me worth living for. But that night I vowed to never, ever end my own life even if I feel like it because if nothing else, there’s  one thing in me worth surviving for, my concern and care for others.   My empathy, my ability to see beyond illnesses and difficulties and troubles and mistakes, my desire, my longing to help heal and console in any way I can. This fulfills me.  I know those aren’t my only reasons for living, my reason is just to be,  but when I’m contemplating suicide I usually see nothing to go on for.  But this view is something I will always believe in. Helping others, also helps me. We are all connected.

I don’t live to be a “slave” and used by others, I allow myself to be fulfilled by helping and positively impacting anyone I can.

There are many, many people like me who feel this way about people, that they can heal and are deserving of compassion and love. And if I kill myself there will be one less of us.

(No one should kill themselves even if they aren’t compassionate or empathetic or caring.

Since that night, I haven’t seriously contemplated ending my own life. And if I ever do again, I have a sweet reminder of something worth living for.

And there’s also another lesson to be learned here, anyone can be our teacher even those who are unpleasant, even unpleasant encounters can be inspiring and teach us valuable lessons. This young woman who I debated with that night, this at first seemingly unpleasant encounter, provided me with the chance to think about things which have filled me with hope & inspiration. 

And here I am today, still inspired, still hopeful, still going strong.

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Xox Much love, blessings, & hope to you all.

~Kim

“Don’t judge me by my past, I don’t live there anymore.”

“Possibilities are everywhere.”

“Always go the extra mile, it’s never crowded.”

“Your past is a gift to guide you, it doesn’t have to imprison you.”