Tag Archive | horror

Book recommendations! 📚💜 (Mostly suspense/horror) 😱

Book recommendations!!! 😍📚

(Screencap of my Kindle App – I did not read that black book in the middle, called “Asexuality,” that says “read;” I accidentally skipped to the end and it recorded it as read. And for some reason it won’t let me delete it off of downloads. I’m going to read it but later and I don’t want it showing up here now but can’t get it off.)

This is something I posted on FB last week! 😁

List of books I read in August! All on Kindle! I prefer e-books because I can carry them around more easily, carry multiple ones without it being heavy, can’t lose them, and can read in the dark/falling asleep, my favorite! Also can click a word to see a definition or quickly copy & paste into search box. Then when it’s through, I can easily put it away instead of having to carry it around if I’m out. And they take up less physical space. I travel for work a lot and read when I’m out and about. I can use the highlight function and copy and paste quotes/excerpts. I find e-books much more convenient all the way around.

I love reading but don’t always keep track of the books I read or how often. This month, I decided to list the ones I read. I read various kinds of books, fiction suspense/thriller/mystery, educational, personal development, science fiction, cute romantic love stories, best friend novels…. sometimes I read more suspense, sometimes more educational, sometimes more personal development,….but overall, the ones I seem to read and favor most are fiction suspense/horror/mystery/thriller. I don’t like true criminal stuff unless it’s fictionalized and loosely based on true events.

I love all of these and recommend them all to people who like these kind!

Here is a list with just the titles then I listed them again with descriptions!

1.) The Perfect Son -fiction – horror/suspense
2.) The Moonlight Child – fiction – suspense/mystery
3.) The Best Of Friends – fiction – suspense/mystery/psychological
4.) A Little Book of Ace by Clara Dehlin – educational book on asexuality
5.) One By One “A gripping psychological thriller with a twist you won’t see coming.”

I’m currently reading a thriller called “Victim Of A Delusional Mind” about a young woman abducted by a disturbed person. I may have it complete before August is through. After that, I’m going to read “Layla,” a paranormal thriller. I may read the “Haunting” one here after that.

I think the two books here I found most to be page turners are “One By One” & “The Best of Friends.” Couldn’t put them down!

1.) The Perfect Son -fiction – horror/suspense

DESCRIPTION
“‘Mrs. Cass, we were hoping your son could answer a few questions about the girl who disappeared last night…’

Erika Cass has a perfect family and a perfect life. Until the evening when two detectives show up at her front door.

A high school girl has vanished from Erika’s quiet suburban neighborhood. The police suspect the worst–murder. And Erika’s teenage son, Liam, was the last person to see the girl alive.

Erika has always sensed something dark and disturbed in her seemingly perfect older child. She wants to believe he’s innocent, but as the evidence mounts, she can’t deny the truth–Liam may have done the unthinkable.

Now she must ask herself:

How far will she go to protect her son?”

I don’t like the characters but the book is excellent!

2.) The Moonlight Child – fiction – suspense/mystery
TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ This one involves child abuse. We don’t know until we begin reading it. I thought it was going to be a paranormal thriller.

DESCRIPTION
“A gripping and emotional novel that will leave you wondering about the neighbors next door…

On a cold January night, Sharon Lemke heads outside to see a lunar eclipse when she notices something odd at the house behind her backyard. Through her neighbor’s kitchen window, she sees what appears to be a little girl washing dishes late at night. But the Fleming family doesn’t have a child that age, and even if they did, why would she be doing housework at this late hour?

It would be easy for Sharon to just let this go, but when eighteen-year-old Niki, a former foster child, comes to live with Sharon, she notices suspicious activity at the Flemings’ house as well. When calling social services doesn’t result in swift action, the two decide to investigate on their own.”

Very likable characters (not all of them, but the protagonists).

3.) The Best Of Friends – fiction – suspense/mystery/psychological

TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ – involves gun violence

DESCRIPTION
“An unthinkable tragedy forever changes a group of teens and turns family against family in this edge-of-your-seat thriller that begs to be read in one sitting.

Best friends Lindsey, Kendra, and Dani endure every parent’s nightmare when a tragic accident befalls their teenage boys, leaving one dead, another in a coma, and a third too traumatized to speak.

Reeling from the worst night of their lives, the three mothers plunge into a desperate investigation of the bizarre incident. How could something so horrible happen in their wealthy Southern California suburb?

They soon discover that the accident was just the beginning, and troubling discoveries lead to chilling questions: Do they really know their children? Do they even know each other? As more secrets surface, a fog of doubt and suspicion threatens to poison their families, their friendships, and the whole community.

With the illusion of happiness and safety long gone, these women must now confront the hazards of heartbreak, the consequences of jealousy, and the dangers of living double lives.”

This totally is a book that tempts us to read all in one sitting. I did not want to put it away! In my opinion, none of the characters are likable but the book is definitely great!

4.) A Little Book of Ace by Clara Dehlin – educational book on asexuality

DESCRIPTION
“Learn more about asexuality in this easily digestible book, filled with illustrations, metaphors, definitions, and spaces for your own personal reflections. In a world that isn’t always kind to marginalized communities, it is important to continually educate yourself to better understand others’ experiences. Whether you are hoping to show up better for someone you love, explore your own identity, learn something new, or anything in between, this book will provide you with an understanding of what it means to be asexual.”

Short, easy to understand, and very informative. It seems directed at young people; it’s written with a tone and way that appeals to asexual children(yep, they exist!), but I recommend it for any age.

5.) One by One – “A gripping psychological thriller with a twist you won’t see coming.”

DESCRIPTION:

“One by one, they will get what they deserve…

A night spent sleeping on dirt and leaves is not how Claire Matchett expected to spend her vacation.

She thought this would be a break from the stresses of work and raising her young children.  A chance to repair her damaged marriage.  A week of hiking and hot tubs with two other couple friends.  It sounded like heaven.

Then Claire’s minivan breaks down on a lonely dirt road. With no cell reception, the group has no choice but to hike the rest of the way to their hotel. But it turns out the woods aren’t as easy to navigate as they thought.

Hours later, they are lost. Hopelessly lost. 

And as they navigate deeper into the woods, the members of their party are struck down mysteriously one by one. Has a wild animal been hunting them? Or is the hunter one of them?

But as more time passes, one thing becomes clear:

Only one of them will return home alive.”

All great books! 📚

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever in the world you are! 💜

Xoxo Kim 😍❤️

Clowns 🤡

Clowns 🤡 – Too Much Joy – song

“I have nightmares filled with clowns and you’re there too

You have a big red nose and stupid floppy shoes

You’re becoming one I can see the signs” 🤡

Trigger Warning ⚠️: Phobias mentioned here

Fun fact: Last night, I had a dream about coulrophobia. So I decided to turn myself into a clown. Lol

In the dream, I was watching a movie about a young man with coulrophobia(fear of clowns). I don’t remember what his job was in my dream but whatever it was, his coulrophobia was interfering with his quality of work. For something to do with his job, he had to see a clown 🤡 or something if I remember correctly. His job was not actually about clowns though. It was something he usually did not have to encounter but it just happened that he had to cross paths with a clown now at work, just a coincidence. Maybe he had to visit someone’s house for work where they had a clown figure or photo? I don’t really remember much about that but whatever it was, his quality of work was greatly suffering and his boss was angry. He ordered him to be treated with exposure therapy, a form of treatment often used to treat phobias. The young man was having emotional difficulty with the exposure. He had to walk alone into a dark room in an old warehouse or factory or something like that, at night, full of life sized clown mannequins so he can get used to them and no longer be afraid. He couldn’t handle it.

In the movie in my head, his boss called him and was angrily telling him to get his shit together and stop acting like a coward and get on with it because he had work to get done. He was tired of his “nonsense.” I can still hear his voice dripping with arrogance, disdain, indifference to someone else’s suffering.

The movie in my dream was about how people who were murderers, dressed as clowns just like the clown mannequins used for his exposure, and creeped into the building and stood in the room next to the fake ones so they could eventually jump out at him during his exposure treatment. Lol It wasn’t part of the therapy and his boss wasn’t in on it. They were just psychos who somehow knew about it. They were strangers.

In my dream, I somehow got into the movie. Like it somehow turned real. But this wasn’t strange in my dream like it would have been for real. Like in reality we would be amazed, shocked, or confused if we somehow got into a movie or a movie turned real. But in my dream it was just a casual thing. The movie was all of a sudden not a movie and was real life and I was in it. I was walking into the dark room with the clowns. I knew the killers were in there since I just was watching the movie and wasn’t sure if they would lunge for me or not. But I had something to do in that room. I don’t remember what or even if I knew in the dream but I wasn’t sure if I should keep going and fulfill my obligation or turn around and leave since the killers were in there. The young man wasn’t there and I knew he would be coming soon. I think whatever I had to do was for my own job. This is realistic of me to still consider doing something that needs to be done even if it may be dangerous to me. I work with dogs and sometimes they can be aggressive. There are occasions I still considered interacting with them even when they clearly wanted to rip me to shreds. Lol And occasions I had to still feed and give them water while they were coming at me because a dog has to eat. Lol So this part of my dream makes perfect sense.

I wasn’t scared in the dream but a bit anxious and my body was tense like it was deciding it maybe should run. Then I saw some of the clowns moving and a vague thought crossed my mind like is this real or is it part of a movie I was just watching. It was like reality (the dream’s reality) and the movie blended.

So I wasn’t sure what would happen. Are they going to get me or ignore me? I had a feeling like they weren’t going to try to kill me. This is how I am for real in general, very trusting and always expecting the least bad thing to happen. I generally have this feeling like everything will work out well. I am not very anxious. I have suffered a couple bouts with anxiety but am generally not someone who is anxious. So I wasn’t extremely concerned for myself.

This feeling like this is real but also not is difficult to explain but in the dream it made sense. It was like a blend of something. Like sort of real, sort of not. I think this is common in dreams.

I think I decided not to walk into the room just in case the clowns tried to kill me. Better safe than sorry. Lol I remember walking away with this feeling of being very safe.

Then I woke up. Lol Intrigued by the dream. I don’t know what provoked that vivid and detailed dream or if there is really a movie like this but if there is one, I haven’t seen it. My head just made it up.

I had exposure therapy myself in reality, a few years ago, for debilitating claustrophobia. It began as professional treatment but I quit and handled it on my own, continuing exposure on my own terms. My claustrophobia was interfering with life because I have to get on elevators for work. There is no option sometimes to use the stairs and my claustrophobia was taking over everyday even when I did not have to get on elevators that day because I knew I would soon have to get inside them. In my dream, I sort of remembered my real life exposure therapy and how it was absolutely frightening at first and I experienced empathy and compassion for the young man. It’s like cruelty, irony, the thing we fear most in life is the very thing we must come face to face with alone, to get better.

I used to avoid elevators at all costs. I used to run up 20 or more things of stairs just to avoid them. This wasn’t a problem because I am very healthy and fit and energetic, always have been. But in college I had to get to buildings early to be able to run up 20 or more floors without being late for classes.

Sometimes that isn’t an option and stairs are blocked off. Some years ago, my claustrophobia triggered suicidal depression in me to the point I couldn’t even hold my toothbrush to brush my teeth in the mornings. I couldn’t handle knowing on any random day I may have to go into an elevator and that triggered a depressive episode that became no longer about that; the depression took on a life of its own. So I was struggling with a severe depressive episode on top of a bad, bad case of claustrophobia.

I grew up claustrophobic for an unknown reason. I have been for as long as I can remember, mostly about elevators. But it was rarely a problem because I rarely had any reason to have to get into them. So it may not have been able to be diagnosed as claustrophobia back then. Sometimes I had to avoid visiting people in hospitals because I couldn’t get into an elevator to the hospital room. On the occasions I did force myself, I would have some psychiatric breakdown. I have collapsed in crippling panic and have embarrassed family in front of strangers at the mere thought of getting into an elevator. Now I think it’s hilarious, especially embarrassing my mom and dad. One day when I was little we were all on a glass elevator with a stranger and I began to panic. I screamed at the top of my lungs and began kicking and flailing my arms and yelling let me out, let me out, let me out….just to go up two floors. The stranger turned and just stared in shock. My mom and dad were so embarrassed. ” My mom yelled, “Kim, you did NOT have to act like that!!!” It gives me a good belly laugh now when I remember it. 🤣😂😭😄😹 I remember my body flooded with sweet relief when that door opened.

All these years later, if I wanted to keep my job, I had to get over it. And I did. Years of claustrophobia gone in just a few weeks of simple regular exposure. Exposure works wonders, at least for me. It made me realize how something so powerful and debilitating is actually very, very weak.

Whenever I had to step into an elevator, it felt like I was going to die. My mouth dried up and always tasted like metal, like literally tasting fear. My entire body felt squeezed in the chokehold of death. The fear is so powerful it feels like I would *literally* go insane, like lose all sense of language and awareness and bodily movements. I felt like I could claw out my own eyes and claw off my own skin. And one day I actually did claw my own skin off when I was in an elevator alone as a teenager. There was no way out of the building unless I got into an elevator. I went into a panic and just mindlessly began ripping my skin off with my fingernails. Everything turned white like this blinding light around my head. I couldn’t see or think. All I could do was claw at my own body, my arms and ab, all bleeding when I finally stepped out of the elevator.

Welcome to my nightmare. 🖤

(almost had a cow when I saw this a couple years ago 😳 🤣 Just sitting there, doors wide open as if to tempt me; it felt like it was watching me, daring me. Lol It’s an old out of service elevator in a building I visit for work. It hasn’t been in use for some years and is in a strange place, not near the rest of the elevators and looks all old and dingy while the rest are newer looking and its doors are ALWAYS closed. But one day, I walk by and the doors are open! Holy guacamole! My heart nearly leapt out of my chest. Luckily my claustrophobia was already healed by then but this thing made it want to come back 🤣😭😹 Some things you just can’t unsee)

It has always felt like an eternity before the doors opened again and a sense of deep, deep dread and despair & regret as I watched them close on me.

It’s a kind of fear that knocks the wind out of me and takes my whole breath away. I have been in awe at how powerful it is.

I had a relapse once after mostly recovering when it seemed like an elevator door took a second too long to open, when I was inside by myself. It came back with a vengeance. It was way worse than before. I got mostly rid of the claustrophobia on my own by getting into elevators with dogs and found it healing. Then it came back then the regular exposure on my own helped significantly.

Now even if a door seems to take longer to open, I don’t have breakdowns or relapses. I get into elevators everyday by myself with no problems at all and find them very peaceful. Like a very brief reprieve where the outside world and all its problems and noise and stress and drama can’t touch me.

I love how a place that once felt so dark and cold and deadly is now a place of warmth and security like being wrapped in a cozy blanket.

There are some random occasions, I am a bit anxious with elevators and avoid them or sometimes suck it up and get into them anyway. But it’s not frequent. And not severe. I know if I am already anxious about something else, something unrelated, and have to get into an elevator, it sometimes triggers the claustrophobia but it goes away again. I believe if I ever stop getting into elevators for a long while then I do again, the claustrophobia may come back. I have experienced this already. So I try to get into them as much as possible to keep it away. It’s a lifelong condition that has to be controlled with regular exposure or I will go insane with fear again.

I don’t know what is up with this dream. Lol But it reminds me a bit of my own real experience. Even the old, dark warehouse where the clowns were. My work office used to be in one. Lol

I am not afraid of clowns and never have been. This wasn’t a scary dream at all. It wasn’t a nightmare even though it may seem like it. I don’t usually have dark or scary dreams. They’re usually positive, happy, or mundane. Though I have been plagued off and on, for as long as I can remember, by nightmares about being inside elevators and being stuck in them, sometimes with people, usually alone. Or sometimes terrifying dreams knowing I will soon be getting into an elevator. Sometimes I wake myself up before it happens or I force myself awake after I get into one if I can. I still have them on rare occasions but almost never since the claustrophobia went away. They are horrifying dreams and just dreadful. I had them since I was little even when I did not have to get into elevators and haven’t been recently in one. My brain just obsessed with them for some reason. I don’t ever remember any unpleasant experience with elevators that made this happen, just grew up with it. My earliest memories are terror when near an elevator. Couldn’t even bring myself to look at them walking by. I used to curse whoever invented them. I felt like that person destroyed my life sometimes.

This dream is bizarre for me because I don’t usually have them like this and it seems a bit creative. I’m not someone who is a creative writer or anything. So I don’t know why my head made this up.

Very recently, like just over one week ago, I saw the word “heliophobia” and looked it up to see what it is(a fear of the sun or bright light) and while scrolling, the word “coulrophobia” showed up. I think this is what inspired the dream but don’t know why just seeing that word and a pic of a clown holding balloons would inspire a whole story in my head while I sleep. Lol It’s heliophobia I was was interested in, not the clown one.

And the dream was very, very vivid. I remember the clowns and their faces and their pastel colored pj’s and balloons.🎈 And I remember the young man very clearly but don’t remember ever seeing him for real in person. I read before that all faces we see in dreams are real faces we saw at one point in life, even if years ago. It doesn’t mean in the dream they were who they are in reality, just that the face is real. I don’t know if it’s true.

Horror movies are my guilty pleasure, which I think also contributed to the dream, and I think this would be a good movie! 😍

I hope you are having a beautiful day or night wherever you are!

Xoxo Kim 💜

Fred❤-Nightmare on Elm Street-Life Lesson💚

(This is a picture I took of the screen of a Kindle while the movie was on pause. It’s not a movie clip even though it looks like it. lol)

“Why are you screaming when I haven’t even cut you yet?”

I wrote this a while ago and forgot to post it! I just remembered it while working on another post about a scary & inspiring movie.

I was watching the newer version of Nightmare on Elm Street one night recently and there is a scene where Fred is about to kill a young boy with his razor fingers. In case you dont know what that movie is(I was assuming everyone does since it’s so old and popular but then realized maybe not. Especially if you’re not into horror stuff), it’s about a bunch of teenagers who are stalked in their dreams, while they sleep, by a man named Fred who has razor fingers and a burned face. Whatever he does to them in their dreams, happens for real. If he slashes their skin in their dreams and they manage to live, they wake up with a cut on them and if he kills them in their dream, they don’t wake up at all. If they get burned in their dreams, they wake up with a burn mark on their skin.

So anyway, I was watching this movie and Fred was after a young boy and he was screaming and Fred said:

“Why are you screaming when I haven’t even cut you yet?”

I laughed when he asked it. Fred asked sarcastically and laughed a sort of mocking laugh. My automatic thought was the kid is about to be slashed to death so of course he is going to be freaked out seconds before it happens, even hours or days before if he knew it’s coming. Fred was looming over him with those razor fingers.

Then a second later I realized something. Freddy actually has a good point.

“Why are you screaming when I haven’t even cut you yet?”

Why are we anticipating something and getting worked up over something that hasn’t happened yet? Wasting current moments that are not even filled with whatever we dread just because future moments will be or may be. Don’t we all or most do this in reality in everyday life? We think about something we have to do later and don’t want to. We think about how much it sucks that tomorrow is Monday when today is still Sunday. We look at the weather forecast and curse the rain or cold when this moment is sunny and warm as can be. We’re late and on our way to work or somewhere else important and are full of dread about the reactions of others when we walk in late, it’s nearing the end of our vacation or day off and we’re thinking about how tomorrow it’s back to work and responsibilities. We have so, so much anxiety about things that have not even happened yet and are ruining, wasting, overlooking this perfect moment right here. It doesn’t even make sense when we really contemplate it.

So it kind of makes sense to be screaming when there is a psycho hanging over us with a knife even before he cuts us. And I’m saying “he” just because Freddy is a man. But a psycho killer can be a female or other gender, of course. Like what are we supposed to do, look around the room and take pleasure in the colors or decorations or look around outside and bask in the beauty of the scenery when we know at any moment, we’re about to be slashed? Actually, that doesn’t sound like a very bad idea, does it? We’re going to get slashed either way so why not make the best of it? Some people are enlightened enough to be able to do this even in the face of their own death or other destruction, but most of us are probably not. Some people do know they’re about to die soon and still take great pleasure in the beauty of life, maybe even more so than before their illness or whatever is coming to take them. So it is possible. It takes a strong, brave, wise mind, which we can build if we don’t already have it. Also, I think it’s usually people who are dying of an illness who can do this because they have a while to process it. It’s probably different when there is someone currently threatening us with violence and we may die a brutal death in a matter of seconds. A stranger did hold a gun to my chest many years ago, and threaten to kill me. It happened so fast and I was too shocked and caught off guard to be scared. After it was over, I was very angry and still not scared. But I certainly was not looking around taking pleasure in the scenery. lol

But this scene in this movie reminds me of all the other, more mundane moments in life we are screaming before we are even cut. Fred was being a sarcastic dick but still great wisdom beneath the ridicule or sarcasm!

“Don’t look for peace. Don’t look for any other state than the one you are in now; otherwise, you will set up inner conflict and unconscious resistance. Forgive yourself for not being at peace. The moment you completely accept your non-peace, your non-peace becomes transmuted into peace. Anything you accept fully will get you there, will take you into peace. This is the miracle of surrender.”

So profound; even just doing this once, it is quite powerful and healing. But if we keep doing this again and again, it becomes a way of life and gives way to a generally peaceful, calm, joyful life. I forget this sometimes and reminders are fantastic! I am not enlightened yet so I appreciate all the reminders I can get.

I am reminded to live in this moment, bask in the beauty of now, even if there is currently little peace. Why throw it away fretting about tomorrow or later today? We can worry about whatever it is when it gets here. The pain, the rain, the hassle, the stress,…leave it where it belongs. In the future. Then when it finally does get here, we can take a few deep breaths and still appreciate the beauty and goodness around and within us. Or have a breakdown, whatever seems right then. But let’s not allow something that hasn’t happened yet to taint this very moment.

What is good right here, right now?

Savor it.

Standing Knee Deep in a River (And Dying of Thirst) – Joe Cocker version

…And I guess we never learn
Go through life parched and empty
Standing knee deep in a river and dying of thirst
Now, the sidewalk is crowded
The city rolls by
And I rush through another day
A world full of strangers
Turn their eyes to me
And I just look the other way
And they roll by just like water
I guess we’ll never learn…

I have said before, horror movies are often packed with wisdom and inspiration or at least have a couple inspiring scenes or themes. I especially seem to notice it with ghost movies. Whether or not that is the intention, they can definitely inspire us along with thrilling us!

Thank you, Fred, for your wisdom! (even though you’re a creepy perv)

If you are a fiction horror movie/book fan, do you see the life lessons, wisdom, inspiration in them or just the thrills? Do you know of any popular horror books/movies, like this, with a line or theme that is inspiring along with all the horror? Or maybe a non-popular one? We get so wrapped up in the thrill or horror aspect, we may overlook the wisdom.

Prayer to Kuan Yin

This is a short meditation music clip I share often on social media. It is my favorite thing. It’s exhilarating and energizing in the mornings and calm and peaceful in the evenings. Perfect for any part of the day and short so we can easily incorporate it into our busy lives or schedules. And for longer meditations if we choose, we can put it on replay. It is so beautiful! And inspiring! It helped me during that six months of hell last year battling debilitating health anxiety. It was six months of Hell on Earth but also six months of love and beauty and happiness and joy. I somehow managed to still experience happiness and joy even with it. And it deepened my love for life even more. And this music/chant here helped. Om mani padme hum is a chant of love.

Much love & light wherever you are,

And big hugs if you like hugs, if not, then I’ll just send you some virtual lovin’❤😁

P.s Thank you, thank you, thank you for the likes on my lasts posts and the blog follows! I will return the favor soon! WordPress is not compatible with the phone I have and it’s hard to navigate, even using the app. It used to be so much easier years ago. And it uses cookies now, which I do not like. It takes me longer to figure it all out now. Thank you! It’s more than just someone liking/reading our posts; it means someone is giving their time and energy to us when they can be doing anything else in the world. That is a couple minutes, you will never get back and you gave them to me. I am beyond honored. ❤

xoxo Kim 💚

Abandoned Dead

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Sometimes the dead come back….

“July fourth, the fireworks are beautiful. Loud. Terrifying. I suppose it’s like life, love, sex, death.”

Recently I was looking through Amazon movies for Kindle and saw an amazing looking movie! It’s called “Abandoned Dead” and looks like the creepiest movie that ever did exist! I LOVE scary movies, especially supernatural thrillers! This movie does have supernatural overtones.

It’s considered a “B movie” like one that isn’t good, second rate, bad horror movie….and has terrible reviews! it got like two and a half stars out of like ten I think! :-O

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The movie is about a young woman who is a security guard and suffers with a fear of nighttime and she’s asked to work the night shift at a creepy medical clinic she has never been to before. The girl doesn’t like being anywhere but home at night. She makes sure she only works day shifts. The clinic is located in a very bad neighborhood where there’s gangs and stabbings and shootings frequently. The medical clinic specializes is treating those afflicted with drug addiction. So there is breakins kind of frequently there because people who are addicted need a fix and in the clinic they have a drug used to help treat them.

The girl, Rachel, agrees to work the night shift to help out her coworker who needs off, even though she’s terrified of night. She has to work alone in the building that she has never been in before. Very bizarre things start happening. She hears whispers and someone saying her name now and again, strange phone calls occur, she hears someone whispering “he’s coming…,” and other strange occurrences.

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Three people who worked at that very same clinic were murdered in the last two years, presumably by the same person. And nothing connects them but the fact that they all worked at that clinic at one point. A police detective is investigating the homicides late into the night but feels like he’s getting nowhere. They were all killed in a most gruesome way, in a similar fashion. And their hearts were taken out….while they were still conscious! They don’t show these scenes in the movie; we see the detective at his desk at night going over files and we hear his thinking voice. For the most part it’s not a gory, gruesome movie.

It is a strange, scary, fascinating movie! 

I read some of the reviews. I like reading reviews for movies and books but they usually don’t influence my decision to read/watch something or not.  If they are objective and say something I really don’t like then I may not watch/read it, like for example if it says the book or movie doesn’t have an ending and just cuts off. I don’t like when stories don’t have an ending. Even series, I prefer them to all be “stand-alones.” But I usually go through them to find more reviews similar to be sure instead of just going by one. 

Also, maybe when the reviews say there’s no plot or real story and just a bunch of scenes thrown together, I may not read/watch.

But if the reviews just say something like “this movie/book sucks” I’m most likely not going to listen. That’s subjective and just because one person or even thousands think a movie or book sucks, it doesn’t mean I will think so.

Anyway, this movie has some BAD reviews!
Some say that the main character isn’t really well developed, like we don’t know much about her.

I do prefer characters in movies and books to have substance and be well described by the writer. 

Some have said the camera lingers longer than necessary on the freaky scenes or something like that. 

Others have said that the end doesn’t make sense. 

I think someone said there’s not much of a plot.

Some admitted to not even watching the whole movie before writing an unpleasant review.

(I usually don’t think this is a good idea….at least watch/read to the end before criticizing! but there may be some exceptions though like maybe if the spelling, grammar, punctuation….is so horrible it can’t even be comprehended to get to the end…)

But I did not let any of these reviews deter me! 

I just had to see the movie!

So I bought it on Kindle and watched it two nights in a row!

I just love it! What a gem!

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The only reviews out of those I mentioned here, that I agree with are the ones that  say the ending doesn’t make sense. It is difficult to interpret.

But after I watched the movie again, even before seeing the end again, I started to make more sense or it. It’s a great ending. A shocker and creative.  

I still don’t completely understand the entire thing. Maybe it’s meant to be that way? 

I did see a review saying it’s too slow, the movie. It’s only an hour and seventeen minutes long. It is kind of slow paced in a way but I love it. 

We do learn more about the girl and her traumatic past. And the movie does have a plot or storyline that makes sense for the most part. But there are some confusing scenes and things that are open to different interpretations it seems.

I like the music that plays throughout the movie, it seems somehow fitting. It’s not creepy but still perfect for certain scenes.  

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I love the scenes where the police detective is running through the streets at night and strange things happen. I love the city lights and the feel of the night and his long tan trench coat. And the weird phone calls he receives whenever he runs past a public payphone.

“She isn’t safe….” in a weird voice! 

There’s something lonely and poetic and beautiful about the movie, something I can’t quite explain, especially about the parts with the detective. Something about him being alone and frustrated late into the night trying to catch a murderer to keep everyone safe. He wears a wedding ring but we never see him interact with a lover of his. 

The acting is good, the filming and directing all seem good. I’m not a movie critic though so don’t have the skills to truly judge the setup and all. But I still know bad acting and filming when I see it and this isn’t it! Then again, I’m very easy to please. It’s rare that I see a movie or eat food I don’t like! 

This though, is a fantastic movie! I love it!

Great job! 😀

The reason I’m sharing this movie here now is, the beautiful quote above! It’s out of this movie. We hear the detective thinking it along with other interesting things. 

I love the comparison with fireworks and life. Beautiful, terrifying, messy….

I don’t like fireworks, it’s true, they are loud and terrifying but beautiful. 

They are horrible and dangerous and traumatic for some, but seeing the colors bursting in the night sky, the sense of unity and celebration among those watching….is beautiful.

Something similar can be said of life itself and the situations we experience in this life. Even though it can be terrifying and disturbing, it’s still beautiful and there’s always something good to seize and embrace and cherish. It doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful and happy. 😀

Much love & light to you, always. ❤

Xoxo Kim 

Insidious Chapter 3 {Love & Hope} <3

I watched this movie again tonight and am inspired all over again! As I wrote, I love the life lessons this movie conveys whether or not they were intended. I feel that it’s a movie about staying alive even when it hurts, even when it feels unbearable. Our home is here on Earth for now. And here on Earth is where we belong right now. Don’t give up! Also, the part where the psychic lady tells the girl who lost her mom to cancer, that she can stop looking for her mom, she is always with her, whispering in her ear when she’s confused or feels alone, is one of the best. Even if we don’t believe in ghosts, spirits, angels….those we love & lose remain with us in memory, in our hearts/minds. We don’t have to look anymore. They are here, within, always. ❤ ❤ Much love & light to you, always. ❤

A Dose of Inspiration

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“I choose to FIGHT BACK! I choose to RISE, not fall! I choose to LIVE, not die! And I know, I know that what’s within me is also WITHIN YOU.” (Mayor Pappas, “City Hall” movie quote)

Last night I saw the movie Insidious chapter 3. I love the Insidious movies! They are seriously the creepiest movies I ever saw! And I’m not a believer in ghosts but hell if they don’t creep me out!  

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I absolutely love Insidious Chapter 3. It’s creepy, it’s dark, it’s distressing and thrilling. But that’s not why I love it so.

There are a few lessons to be learned, for some people. I don’t know if the writer/s intended to convey these subtle messages or I’m just really reading into the movie and seeing messages that are accidental. 

Please don’t read here any further if you intend to watch the movie and haven’t seen…

View original post 1,639 more words

314

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“‘It’s going to happen in three minutes.’ Mark Tapper sat on the edge of his son’s bed and tried to comfort the eight-year-old. He considered calling an ambulance, but he didn’t know if what Jeremy was suffering from qualified as an emergency. He decided to wait for his wife to get home, since she’d be there in just a few minutes anyhow. She’d left work early when the school called, but Mark was able to get to Widowsfield Elementary to pick Jeremy up first. 

‘What’s going to happen in three minutes?’ Mark glanced at the clock on the nightstand that displayed 3:11 on the stomach of a Batman figurine. ‘I told you,’ said Jeremy. The desperation in his voice terrified Mark.

 ‘The Skeleton Man’s coming.’ 

‘I don’t know what that means, kiddo. Help me out here.’ Mark tried to wipe sweat from his boy’s brow, but Jeremy jerked away as if frightened by contact. ‘Who’s this Skeleton Man you keep talking about?’ 

‘He’s coming, and then everyone’s going to go crazy. Dad, I don’t want to kill you again.’

 The statement was more than a little disconcerting. Mark stood up and put his hands on his head in exasperation as he stared down at his quivering child. He’d tried to stay calm through all of his son’s outbursts, but he couldn’t take it anymore.

 ‘That does it. Mom can meet us at the hospital. Do you think you can walk, or do you want me to call an ambulance?’ This manic episode confounded the school nurse, and it was getting worse the longer it went on. When Mark picked his son up from school, Jeremy had simply been crying, but now his mania had gone from concerning to disturbing. 

‘There’s no time. I can already hear his teeth.’ Jeremy looked at his father and chattered his teeth, as if he was freezing cold. Then he looked at the clock and they both saw the time change. 3:12 
Jeremy put his hands under his pillow and bunched it up so the sides covered his ears. He clenched his eyes shut and continued to weep. 

‘You should just kill yourself. Make it easy. Just shoot yourself in the head and get it over with. You can’t handle what’s coming. No one can.'”

(The beginning of book 1 in the trilogy.) 

Wth?! Lol This scene is what got me hooked (a little bit obsessed!) with this trilogy a few years ago. 

I wasn’t sure if I was going to read it if it doesn’t have an ending until reading all three but that scene pulled me in and I decided to read it anyway even if I had to wait for the other two books to come out. 

Today is a special, special day! (so is every other day but today is especially special! Lol ;-)) 

It’s 314!

There’s a fiction book trilogy, called 314 (see the scene above!) , It’s one of the best things I ever encountered in this life. 

Lol

It’s an incredibly bizarre story, involving what seems like other dimensions. We cannot read books 2 or 3 without first reading book 1 or we won’t make an ounce of sense of it. Book 1
Itself is very difficult to comprehend in some ways. And books 2 and 3 only get weirder.

I wrote about it here 

 https://inspirationalgem.wordpress.com/2013/12/06/some-comforting-words-about-moving-forward-and-book-review-314/

a couple years ago.

If I remember correctly, there’s a lot of errors in my post that I don’t think are corrected, like spelling and grammar errors and stuff. I don’t know why. Usually, I don’t mess up like that. I remember reading my post a while after  publishing it and thinking “like wth?!”
Lol

I was going to correct the errors but never got around to it. Who cares, right?! You get the message. I’m no grammar phanatic (i’m a philadelphia girl, it’s how we spell fanatic lol) so yeah.

Anyway, today is 314! So in honor of this lovely, lovely (and wonderfully rainy!) day, I’m going to promote this wonderful author and his trilogy! And again share some deep wisdom in this story!  

I must warn you. These books are nassstaaayy!

Lol Full of gore and stuff, which I usually don’t care for! But at least the violence can’t occur for real because it’s like dead human-canine kids who kill people. They come out of some green fog and just tear everyone to shreds.

I can’t even begin to explain. 

Book 1 doesn’t have a complete ending, it doesn’t even touch on the conclusion of the story but I was satisfied at the end before reading books 2 and 3.
I felt as if I had some somewhat sensible, if vague, answers.

One thing I love about the books is, the story involves friends, both new and old, unconditional love, wisdom, and is just wildly entertaining and freaky.

You won’t read anything more bizarre as long as you live. I can almost guarantee it! 

Each year on March 14th, at 3:14pm, incredibly bizarre and terrifying things begin to happen to a town called Widowsfield.

And the people kind of know something is about to happen but they don’t really know, at least not consciously. Some remember some of the events better than others. They know they are going to die….again….then again…in the most horrific, agonizing ways.

It’s just freaky! 

Here are some interesting scenes:

“Jaime looked down at her scrawling. 3.141592653”
‘Is that pi?’
 ‘Yeah. We were supposed to memorize ten digits of it for Mr. Trager for pi day.’

 Anna settled back in her chair and snickered. ‘Sure, for the test this morning. Why are you still writing it?’
 Jaime paused for just a moment. ‘I don’t know. There’s something calming about it. Is that crazy?’
 ‘A little bit, yeah.’
 Anna watched Jaime write the sequence over and over, oddly transfixed.
Then Jaime wrote the final digit as a 4 instead of a 3 in one line. 
‘You got that one wrong.’ Jaime didn’t stop writing and didn’t look up. 
‘There’s no such thing as a perfect circle. There’s chaos in all of it.’
Jaime looked up at the ceiling and then at the window before she asked, ‘Do you hear that?’

“Anna watched the shapes in the fog advance. The silhouettes of children ran across the field from their school, and the barking of dogs grew louder. Soon, the soccer players were attacked and chaos erupted in the library. Teachers and students rushed to the window and time returned to normal as everyone panicked. Jaime moved closer to Anna and ignored the massacre outside. “Why are we doing it again? Why do I know what’s going to happen? I’ve never felt this way before.”

“Jaime and Anna ignored the bloody scene; they’d seen it countless times before. Jaime pulled Anna between two book shelves, away from the screaming mass, to speak in private.”

“…’I don’t know, I can’t explain how I know. I’m not sure what’s going on. I just, for a minute, I could hear him in my head. I knew his thoughts. He’s looking for a girl he lost. She was an innocent, and he needs her to help him stop this from happening again.’ ‘I don’t understand any of that,’ said Jaime.
‘I don’t either, but I know he’s going to keep doing this over and over until he finds her.”Then what?’ asked Jaime. ‘I don’t know.'”

“Jaime and Anna embraced as they waited for their inevitable death. Then it would begin anew, slightly different from the times before, and they would forget the prying mind of The Skeleton Man as he continued to try to complete the circle.”

And here is a scene out of one of the trilogy books that I shared in the post above. This scene is full of wisdom & hope. 

This is what I wrote in the other post:
The girl, Alma, whose brother disappeared in 1996 meets a little girl but the little girl isn’t real. She’s kind of ghost -like or a figment of someone’s imaginings. She was sent to Alma to help protect Alma.  She is a very wise little girl. And she has some comforting words for Alma. Alma’s life has been painful. She’s a young teacher. Her dad was abusive to her and her brother and he still comes after her as an adult. He is addicted to the meth drug. Her mom went insane after her son (Alma’s brother) disappeared and she became sick with severe depression.  And she died by suicide because she couldn’t handle her son being missing.

Then Alma watches her friends dying over and over all day everyday and she is so confused and worn out and knows her own life is in danger.  All the characters think they’re going crazy.  Alma just wants to give up. Just when she collapses outside thinking she can’t go on anymore, a little girl about ten years old comes to Alma. She reminds Alma of herself when she was a little girl.

This little girl takes Alma’s hand and says:

“It’s not a bad thing to remember our worst days but it’s important that we learn to move on. “

Alma responds saying

“I’ve had a lot of bad days.”. 

The little girl puts her head against Alma’s arm and says

“I know you have. But you can’t let those bad days ruin the ones you’ve got left to live.”. 

Isn’t this beautiful?! So much wisdom and light. We don’t have to allow painful memories and things that happened before to hold us back and ruin our present days.

I hope you’re having a lovely 314 full of love & laughter and not full of gore, green fog, canine kids, and the Skeleton Man! 😉

❤ 😀

Much love to you,

Xoxo Kim 

You are the music…

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“You are the music while the music lasts.” ~
(edited: Rumi – not T.s quote!)

Today I woke up very early after only three hours of sleep. It was still dark out and very windy and rainy and freezing cold! Just yesterday it was like 60 degrees! Lol

Now today it’s 30 something degrees.

Wth? Lol 😀

I woke up to the windchimes sounding in the backyard.  So beautiful.

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I felt peace & inner calm and a deep connection to the musical wind. 

I remembered this quote above. It’s a lovely quote that can be interpreted different ways. 

It’s perfect for my one word challenge. (my word is beauty)

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I don’t function well at all with only a few hours of sleep. I always needed a lot of hours of sleep in one night, like nine or ten! 

But I woke up in a great mood still! After the shower and brushing my teeth I was afraid to look in a mirror before leaving for work. Lol 

I don’t always look fabulous after not getting enough sleep or getting too much sleep. My face breaks out, my throat gets sore, my eyes have dark circles or bags around them, I look tired and just a wreck with not enough sleep! And my hair falls out in clumps!

Today instead of putting my makeup on, I worked on my one word challenge even though I wanted to put makeup on. I should have gotten up earlier (and went to sleep earlier.)

So I dreaded looking in a mirror!  

But I did and was surprised. I don’t look half bad! Lol Probably not perfect but quite alright for only three hours of sleep and not an ounce of makeup to cover up any blemishes.

Here’s a couple pictures.

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Also yesterday was very warm and I celebrated with an iced coffee! Today is very cold and I’m celebrating with a hot blueberry coffee! I’m at work for my manager while she’s away. I’m here alone reading books, drinking blueberry coffee, laughing all by myself! Lol ❤

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I’m reading a fiction mystery thriller Kindle book (but I think it can be ordered as a physical book as well?) about a serial killer who dresses as Santa and creeps around with an ax killing just about anyone she can. (admit it – when you saw “serial killer,” you automatically assumed the thing is a man, right? They are usually men both in reality & in fiction, it seems. But a lil lady can bring just as much destruction!) It’s in December. She’s a young woman with orange/red hair. People think she’s a mental patient who recently got out of a mental hospital after ten years. 
It’s called Santa Took Them. After they are murdered, the words “Santa took them” are written on the wall in blood. Ten years ago on Christmas Eve, a little girl’s family was murdered in a most grusome way and somehow she survived and ended up in their neighbor’s house. She was so traumatized she was hospitalized in a mental hospital for children for ten years then released because she’s 18 years old. She goes to live with her uncle and his girlfriend who are then murdered in a similar fashion as her family years ago and on the wall says the same thing, “Santa took them.” And the girl vanishes without a trace. Many people think she killed her family all those years ago and now her uncle and his girlfriend. But their heads were all chopped off and she was eight years old. Can an eight year old cut four people’s heads off? It takes place in a small town where homicide is virtually unheard of. Now some people see a Santa girl creeping around the woods and the house where the family was murdered. And a couple teenagers and some adults go missing. And all kinds of weird shit keeps happening. It’s one creepy story! It’s really good, a page turner for sure.

I think in murder mystery fiction books there’s two characters who won’t turn out to be the murderer if the author is good at writing mysteries. The character who seems most likely to be the one. And the character who seems least likely to be the one. The author doesn’t want to make it obvious who the killer is. So the character we just “know” is it, likely isn’t.
But in a way, the character who is least likely to be the killer is kind of obvious because we know how fictional murder mysteries go. They are supposed to be shocking. But knowing this, we may assume it’s the most innocent seeming or weakest person who will be the killer. 
It’s definitely not the explicitly obvious one unless the author suspects we’ll suspect it’s the obvious one, therefore assuming it’s not since it’s so obvious, then decides to make the most obvious one the actual killer because we’ll never see it coming.

That would be disappointing! 

Am I rambling?

It’s interesting because in the beginning of this book there’s a quote by Dr. Sam Loomis. Do you recall who he is? Maybe you haven’t seen the movie. He’s the character in the movie, Halloween, the mental health doctor for Michael, the killer. He says “Death has come to your little town sheriff.” And the author of “Santa Took Them” has that quote in this book on the first page. And in this book, the mental patient’s mental health doctor is also named Dr. Sam Loomis, short for Samantha! I like how he made her a woman with the same name! And same kind of doctor! And the girl is named Michelle and I think that’s a feminine form of Michael. I wonder if there’s anymore little details taken out of Halloween and put in this book with little changes! Maybe the whole book is full of them!

My sister and me before were saying how hilarious it would be to write a really fascinating mystery book with an intentionally sucky ending just for shitz & gigglez. I can’t stop laughing when I think about it. Like a serious mystery that people can’t wait to see unfold then at the end it makes no sense or just cuts off abruptly and says “the end” and there’s no real explanation. Or like if it’s a murder mystery, a realistic one then at the end the murderer turns out to be a flying hot dog or a ghost when the story isn’t a supernatural one. People would be so pissed and want their money back! And their time! Lmao

You think you read books with lousy endings before, you haven’t seen it yet! j/k Luckily for the world I’m not a writer (except here lol), not now, not ever. But my sister is and hopes to publish books and write films one day. She wouldn’t really do that sucky ending thing though! It’s just a funny fantasy. ;-D

Anyway, I just love fiction murder mysteries! (but never real ones) It’s disgusting isn’t it?! My guilty pleasure!

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I’m listening to Tom Jones singing

She’s A Lady – mobile / desktop and it’s a great song! But a bit condescending wouldn’t you say?

“I never would abuse her…”?? Really? No shit, Tom! The way he says it like it’s even an option!

&

“She never asks very much and I don’t refuse her.” Why should she have to ask him for anything like it’s his place to refuse her. He’s not her master!

She always knows her place?
She’s never in the way?

Excuse me??

I can leave her on her own?
What is she your dog or your child or something.

lol But I love the song & music!
Another Guilty pleasure!

😀

Much love,

Xoxo Kim ❤

p.s. I don’t know the end yet of “Santa Took Them” but I have a suspicion of how it will pan out and I would love to write it but I don’t want to in case someone is reading it or planning to, I don’t want to influence the person’s perception but if you don’t mind, I’m going to share my suspicion which may be completely incorrect.

Possible spoil alert

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I think maybe the mental patient, Michelle, has a dissociative disorder and like a split personality and is killing them but doesn’t consciously know she’s the one killing them. Anyway, I can’t wait to see! 😀