I have been so inspired to post here for the last few days. I have been having amazing, inspirational thoughts swirling around in my head like magic and have been wanting to share but I couldn’t. Because of work. I have been working every single day for almost two weeks straight and often very long shifts with no breaks.
We have no breaks like lunch breaks where I work because my boss is generous and let’s us eat & drink whatever we want whenever we want. So we don’t have scheduled breaks. And I don’t have a problem with that. But when it’s busy it’s difficult to get a chance to even take a quick swig of soda! And it sure has been busy. And it’s sucking the life out of me.
My only coworker recently had surgery and has been out for a while and my boss and manager were on vacation for a couple weeks. So I have been practically running the place myself with almost no help. And it has taken a toll on me!
My job itself is not life draining. I love working at the store and it’s generally a very positive environment. But working almost two weeks with no day off and extremely long hours is life draining.
And to top it off on Monday, my manager’s first day back after her vacation I had work that night after an eleven hour shift the day before and when I came into work my manager complained to me about the floor. And the sinks. I mopped the floor three times the night before but our mop was old and not so effective anymore. I soaked it thoroughly but it still put gray streaks across the floor. Not bad ones but still noticable.
I did every single thing I was supposed to do. I got out of work a half hour late making sure the place was clean as can be and my manager complained to me! After I took over the place when no one else could or would! I had to put my own needs and desires on hold and neglect them for work. And it was unpleasant.
I was not expecting an extra pay, or appreciation, or a thank you or anything like that! But I surely wasn’t wanting to get complained to for something so trivial that doesn’t happen often and wasn’t even something I did intentionally or carelessly.
That took the life out of me even more. Even my one day off I was too exhausted to do much. I just mostly slept the whole day.
It’s not just work though, my new puppy is like a human baby. He wakes me up in the early morning and for the next few hours wants to play literally non stop! He will not let me sleep and I am so exhausted for the rest of the day! Lol. But he is a cutie and I love that boy!
Here’s the little terror right here.
Parts of my days for the last few I have felt so lifeless but then it would rain or flowers would bloom or I would look up at the beautiful bright blue sky dappled in pretty whiteclouds and life would surge right through me again. And I would have the strength and the motivation to keep going.
I absolutely love Nature ‘s sweet gifts.
This is the view outside my bedroom Window! How blessed I am! These perfect purple flowers bloomed on the tree this Spring. A little bit of heaven right here on Earth! Oh yes, how lovely.
I took a pic of this old fashioned looking trolley and then put a vintage effect on the photo to make it look even more old fashioned! I am quite the photographer! Lol jk!
And I just laughed really hard at my own joke. I’m talking about a good belly laugh!
;-p
One of our Septa busses here in beautiful Philadelphia!
This is me.
Me again.
So i’ll end the pictures in this post here.
In this post I will let people know that it’s ok to not always be strong or feel strong or be perfect in everything you do.
Whatever your definition of strong or perfection is, or whatever definition of those you feel the need to live up to it’s ok to sometimes let it go. It’s ok to have mini “Breakdowns” and get angry, stressed, frustrated, or cry and complain.
You don’t always have to give it your all.
That’s not something we hear often but sometimes it’s best to rest and not try so hard.
You can slack or rest. Be good instead of great. Or ok instead of good sometimes. That’s ok.
You can collapse into bed and just rest all day when you have nothing to do or even blow off certain things you are expected to do just to care for yourself.
You can skip your exercise routine once in a while or even take a day off work or class. But don’t skip sleep or rest or food.
It’s ok to feel weak sometimes.
Also everyone has problems now and then. Some may seem worse than others or more deserving of empathy or sympathy or more “Appropriate” to complain about but just because someone else’s problem seems worse doesn’t mean yours isn’t real or bad or that you should keep yours bottled up inside just because it seems like “Less”. Other people’s problems do not obliterate yours.
If it inspires you to think “There are worse problems so I should feel Grateful.” then definitely think that way! But if it just hurts you and makes you feel guilty then let that thought go and let yourself complain and release and express your emotions in a healthy way.
Your emotions, thoughts, and your problems are valid and deserving of attention. And you don’t have to feel guilty. Just be.
It’s ok not to feel grateful every second of everyday. In my opinion we should definitely generally live a life of gratitude and develop or strengthen the habit of being grateful and seeing the positive often, even almost always, but it’s definitely ok to sometimes just vent and admit that we don’t always feel grateful or happy.
Negative emotions and thoughts are part of living. And since you’re a living human you will experience negativity and the desire or need to react to it. So go ahead, let your self.
One thing that is extremely helpful is meditation.
Here is a great website all about meditation with free downloadable mp3’s!!
http://www.meditationoasis.com/
This is good for beginners so if you don’t know much about it you can learn and they also have advanced meditation mp3’s for people who are already acquainted or at ease with it.
I took a meditation course in college where I practiced and learned all about it. The one I’m interested in is mindfulness meditation. They have so many mp3’s. Ones to help you with gratitude, anger, pain, deep rest, pregnancy, creativity, and so many, many more.
Also check this other meditation page out about mindfulness: https://livingmindfully.org/
When I meditate my whole body feels rested and I feel rested mentally as well.
It’s an amazing experience that cannot really be explained in words, it must be practiced. It’s good to meditate regularly. I used to morning and then again at night but began slacking! But I intend to begin again!
Xoxo Kim
P.s. Since my new phone is so perfectly compatible with the mobile wordpress app and it allows multiple photos in the same entry, you will be seeing many, many more pictures that Itake as long as you keep checking out my blog! Yay! It’s a dream come true! 😀