Tag Archive | Venting

Lifeless & Inspired

I have been so inspired to post here for the last few days. I have been having amazing, inspirational thoughts swirling around in my head like magic and have been wanting to share but I couldn’t. Because of work. I have been working every single day for almost two weeks straight and often very long shifts with no breaks.

We have no breaks like lunch breaks where I work because my boss is generous and let’s us eat & drink whatever we want whenever we want.   So we don’t have scheduled breaks.   And I don’t have a problem with that.   But when it’s busy it’s difficult to get a chance to even take a quick swig of soda! And it sure has been busy. And it’s sucking the life out of me.

My only coworker recently had surgery and has been out for a while and my boss and manager were on vacation for a couple weeks. So I have been practically running the place myself with almost no help. And it has taken a toll on me!

My job itself is not life draining. I love working at the store and it’s generally a very positive environment.   But working almost two weeks with no day off and extremely long hours is life draining.  

And to top it off on Monday, my manager’s first day back after her vacation I had work that night after an eleven hour shift the day before and when I came into work my manager complained to me about the floor. And the sinks. I mopped the floor three times the night before but our mop was old and not so effective anymore. I soaked it thoroughly but it still put gray streaks across the floor. Not bad ones but still noticable.

I did every single thing I was supposed to do. I got out of work a half hour late making sure the place was clean as can be and my manager complained to me!   After I took over the place when no one else could or would! I had to put my own needs and desires on hold and neglect them for work. And it was unpleasant.

I was not expecting an extra pay, or appreciation, or a thank you or anything like that! But I surely wasn’t wanting to get complained to for something so trivial that doesn’t happen often and wasn’t even something I did intentionally or carelessly.

That took the life out of me even more. Even my one day off I was too exhausted to do much. I just mostly slept the whole day.  

It’s not just work though, my new puppy is like a human baby. He wakes me up in the early morning and for the next few hours wants to play literally non stop! He will not let me sleep and I am so exhausted for the rest of the day! Lol. But he is a cutie and I love that boy!

Here’s the little terror right here.  

Parts of my days for the last few I  have felt so lifeless but then it would rain or flowers would bloom or I would look up at the beautiful bright blue sky dappled in pretty whiteclouds and life would surge right through me again.   And I would have the strength and the motivation to keep going.

I absolutely love Nature ‘s sweet gifts.

This is the view outside my bedroom Window! How blessed I am! These perfect purple flowers bloomed on the tree this Spring. A little bit of heaven right here on Earth! Oh yes, how lovely.





I took a pic of this old fashioned looking trolley and then put a vintage effect on the photo to make it look even more old fashioned! I am quite the photographer! Lol jk!

And I just laughed really hard at my own joke. I’m talking about a good belly laugh!


;-p

One of our Septa busses here in beautiful Philadelphia!



This is me.

Me again.

So i’ll end the pictures in this post here.

In this post I will let people know that it’s ok to not always be strong or feel strong or be perfect in everything you do.

Whatever your definition of strong or perfection is, or whatever definition of those you feel the need to live up to it’s ok to sometimes let it go.   It’s ok to have mini “Breakdowns” and get angry, stressed, frustrated, or cry and complain.

You don’t always have to give it your all.

That’s not something we hear often but sometimes it’s best to rest and not try so hard.  

You can slack or rest. Be good instead of great. Or ok instead of good sometimes. That’s ok.


You can collapse into bed and just rest all day when you have nothing to do or even blow off certain things you are expected to do just to care for yourself.

You can skip your exercise routine once in a while or even take a day off work or class.   But don’t skip sleep or rest or food.

It’s ok to feel weak sometimes. 

Also everyone has problems now and then. Some may seem worse than others or more deserving of empathy or sympathy or more “Appropriate” to complain about but just because someone else’s problem seems worse doesn’t mean yours isn’t real or bad or that you should keep yours bottled up inside just because it seems like “Less”. Other people’s problems do not obliterate yours.

If it inspires you to think “There are worse problems so I should feel Grateful.” then definitely think that way! But if it just hurts you and makes you feel guilty then let that thought go and let yourself complain and release and express your emotions in a healthy way.

Your emotions, thoughts, and your problems are valid and deserving of attention.  And you don’t have to feel guilty. Just be.

It’s ok not to feel grateful every second of everyday. In my opinion we should definitely generally live a life of gratitude and develop or strengthen the habit of being grateful and seeing the positive often, even almost always, but it’s definitely ok to sometimes just vent and admit that we don’t always feel grateful or happy.

Negative emotions and thoughts are part of living.   And since you’re a living human you will experience negativity and the desire or need to react to it. So go ahead, let your self.

One thing that is extremely helpful is meditation.

Here is a great website all about meditation with free downloadable mp3’s!!

http://www.meditationoasis.com/

This is good for beginners so if you don’t know much about it you can learn and they also have advanced meditation mp3’s for people who are already acquainted or at ease with it.

I took a meditation course in college where I practiced and learned all about it. The one I’m interested in is mindfulness meditation.   They have so many mp3’s. Ones to help you with gratitude, anger, pain, deep rest, pregnancy, creativity, and so many, many more.

Also check this other meditation page out about mindfulness: https://livingmindfully.org/

When I meditate my whole body feels rested and I feel rested mentally as well.

It’s an amazing experience that cannot really be explained in words, it must be practiced. It’s good to meditate regularly.   I used to morning and then again at night but began slacking! But I intend to begin again!

Xoxo Kim

P.s. Since my new phone is so perfectly compatible with the mobile wordpress app and it allows multiple photos in the same entry, you will be seeing many, many more pictures that Itake as long as you keep checking out my blog! Yay! It’s a dream come true! 😀

Award & a little bit of venting

If you are offended by a little bit of cursing (not much though) and some venting please read no further. Lol. It’s not pretty! 😉

Ok so today I’m totally about to start ripping out my hair. I feel like throwing a fit seriously. This is nine or ten days straight now that I have been working with no day off. Not one. And there’s absolutely no sign of a day off soon. And in the spring and summer my job is DEMANDING! It’s an ice cream store and each shift only one person works and we get like 20 customers at the Window at once! All through out the day and night.  The place gets a mess and has to be cleaned and so I don’t get out of work when I’m supposed to. Tomorrow I’m working eleven f.u.c.k.i.n.g hours in a row.   No break. Literally. No break. And the reason the word f.u.c.k.i.n.g. Is written like that is my phone will not allow that word.   Yeah.

Everyone is on vacation or getting surgery or just being careless and won’t help me out so here I am working non stop. Alone.

And my new phone which is the blackberry z10 has no option to save pictures off the Internet.   Isn’t that lovely? There’s an app to save whole albums off Facebook but no single pics anywhere else online.  

So if I want to put a picture somewhere that is online I have to copy the link and paste the link for people to click on to see it. Today I got up before work to use my dad’s computer and the computer decided to be a d.i.c.k. And my phone will not allow that word either. The computer would not let me upload the pic here. 

Everything is not working out today and when I find a way around it then that plan won’t work either.   So im having a b.i.t.c.h.i.n.g fest here. Lol

My new phone is amazing though especially the camera. 

I love my job and my customers.   I love working and am very thankful. It’s just that working every single day in a row for over one week and working 11 hour shifts with no break is definitely not my cup of tea and I will become a monster. And I will p.i.s.s. And moan.   But oh well that’s ok.

I know people have more demanding jobs than I have and people work more hours more often like doctors and medical students and that is amazing.   But let me tell you I am not cut out for that shizz!

So I’m about to step off my soapbox right about now!   😉

And just so you know I’m definitely not taking my stress out on people. I’m still friendly and kind. I don’t take stuff out on undeserving people and usually not even deserving ones. I’m not like that.
I’m just venting right here.

I know this blog entry is completely different than what my blog is all about. My blog is about inspiration and gratitude and joy and happiness.   I’m almost never this stressed and angry and even when I am I’m often still calm.  And right now I’m still happy and grateful underneath it. But I really want to vent! I do NOT plan on making a habit of this on here! I promise. 🙂

In fact, today I have one or more happy entries planned for today if I get the chance to post them. I’m at work and if it gets super busy again I may not be able to. I get out at 10 : 00pm tonight.   And have to get right back up again in the morning to start the work day all over again til 10 : 00pm then again Monday.   Now can you see why I’m p.i.s.s.e.d all the way off?! Lol

My phone amuses me! The auto correct is hilarious but has the potential to be embarrassing!

So yeah it’s ok and healthy and necessary to vent every now and then!

Etsuchan at:

http://etsuchan.wordpress.com/

Was kind enough to nominate my blog for the “Soul on Fire” award!! I am so so flattered!!!!! Now it’s my job to nominate 15 more blogs! Blogs that I think are amazing and worthy of the award! So my very next post, hopefully that will be today, will be a list of my fifteen favorite blogs other than http://etsuchan.wordpress.com/

I will list the links to them! Please go check out http://etsuchan.wordpress.com/

She is amazing and beautiful! Very talented and kind.  

And please excuse the venting and cursing above!   Lol like I said I promise I’m usually NOT that bitter!   But they got me overworked! 

I am so thankful for my new phone and the WordPress app for BlackBerry.   The app works amazingly well on this version of black berry unlike my last phone.   This phone has some drawbacks and negative qualities about it but the truth is I can’t complain.   It’s a fantastic product. 

Go visit this lovely blog!










http://etsuchan.wordpress.com/

image

My new phone took that pic! 😀

I hope you all are having a beautiful day or night and much less stressful than mine!

😀