Archive | February 2016

February Sunrise

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“It’s been a long dark night
And I’ve been a waitin’ for the morning
It’s been a long hard fight
But I see a brand new day a dawning
I’ve been looking for the sunshine
‘Cause I ain’t seen it in so long
But everything’s gonna work out just fine
Everything’s gonna be all right
That’s been all wrong”

Last night I remembered my goal to get at least one picture of the sun rising each month this year! I was startled because today is the last day in February and I was thinking if I blow it now, it will be too late!  

But I was determined! So I looked it up to see when the sun would be rising today. It’s 6:35AM so I got myself up at 6:12AM to wait! I went out into the backyard and listened to the birds chirping and watched them as they flew by. It is so magical just to sit outside and truly listen and watch the beauty of nature all around. 

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I took pictures but some moments I put my phone down and allowed my whole self to be engulfed in the beauty. Then I watched as the sun began to rise. It wasn’t a dramatic sunrise. Sometimes it’s really pink or orange and very noticeable. Today it was just a hint of orange that I was able to see but still beautiful and at least I accomplished my goal this month!

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And I got to see so much morning beauty! I’m usually not up this early. I also am delighted to see that the moon was still out! I saw it through the almost bare tree branches. 

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(this one has an effect on it)

When you see it you will shit bricks. lol 😉

The tree reminds me of an impending Spring! It has little things growing on it!

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This morning it feels like it’s about to be Spring!  

I was and still am in awe of the stunning beauty everywhere I look. I am plunged into the depths of it and feel it in my whole being. So much love! ❤

So much wonder!

“‘Cause I can see the light of a clear blue morning
I can see the light of a brand new day
I can see the light of a clear blue morning
And everything’s gonna be all right
It’s gonna be okay”

Light of a Clear Blue Morning – Dolly Parton – mobile

Light of a Clear Blue Morning – desktop

It’s just a mountain; I can move it. ❤

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(This one is not mine!)

😀

~Hugs~ ❤

Much love & light to you, now & forever!

Xoxo Kim 

Monday Inspiration <3

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Today I am blessed to have been able to get a picture of the tree & sky at all stages of the day! Sunrise til sundown then later!

yay!!

The tree above I shared earlier today in the early morn.

Now here it is this afternoon:

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This one is my favorite! The blue, blue sky with fluffy white clouds and look at that stream of blue sunlight shining through!

Now here it is in the early evening:

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And here is the late night pic of the tree:

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This is the worst picture I got but I love it anyway because it’s mine and it does capture nightfall. Also, the sky is full of stars!! So many!! Unfortunately my phone camera cannot always capture the stars but they are here and I see them and that’s all that truly matters. So yeah!

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When I saw the stars I yelled really loudly, the sky!!! It’s full of stars!!! Then I instantly felt embarrassed. Lol I tend to embarrass myself over the weather, nature…things like that, somewhat frequently. 

I just yell wherever I am, not realizing at first, and get all giddy over the stuff everyone else seems to be overlooking or not caring about. 

I think this is one idea of living a full life. Basking in and acknowledging all the simple, free gifts around us. Acknowledging the simple beauty in every breath and honoring it any way we can or want to. 

I am reminded of this quote:

“When you’re under a shady tree, don’t forget to see the sunlight streaming through the branches.”

All trees, including shady ones, are lovely but I love the message to not let the darkness, the pain, the negativity…overpower the goodness.

It’s up to us to see the beauty in the midst of the ugliest situations.

Much love & light to you, now & always!! ❤

😀

xoxo Kim

True Beauty <3

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This isn’t my photo but I love the message that our size isn’t what truly makes us beautiful. Our personality is what is true beauty.

But also, physical beauty is not wrong to celebrate & appreciate and there are beautiful girls (both physically and inside) of all sizes, colors, ethnicities, nationalities, cultures, religions, ages…all around the world.

Let’s build each other up and celebrate diversity & beauty of all kinds. ❤

Hugs & love,

xoxo Kim

QUOTE OF THE DAY

Great motivational quote! Keep moving forward! 😀 Let’s not let anything hold us back. Whatever happened previously, we can use it to deepen our wisdom, our empathy, our compassion…and keep going. Let it inspire us & guide us, not imprison us. ❤

Grappling

So beautiful! ❤ Wonderful imagery. Every word speaks so much and is so profound. Perfect!

Everything I Never Told You

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I’m sitting on a park bench
composing a poem to my
inner nobody.

Traveling via my mind
down a pathless path
to the past.

Knowing it’s never too late
for regret, not in poetry
or a bottle of gin.

The pines around me seem
to thicken with nostalgia.
The leaves rustle their complaints.

I find words in the half
conscious, morose stirrings
of all my yesteryears.

The distorted shadows
of faded summer afternoons.
The air thin there with
near perfect density.

Soon the light will leave me,
fading with dust and ash.

I’ll scale the music now,
while I still remember how
that old song went.

Then I’ll take my paper and pen
and walk off into the bruised wind,
knowing by tomorrow, the world
and the poet will brighten again.

-Tosha Michelle

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time for a beatdown

No, jokes/rude comments about a woman’s weight are not ok. In my opinion. Whether it’s serious or in jest, it can be destructive and is just plain rude and uncalled for. A woman/girl may already be struggling with body image issues or an eating disorder and one dumbass comment can trigger/contribute to a potential  relapse or onset of a disorder. I get some rude/vulgar comments occasionally on Facebook about my body/weight. I am a very confident girl and am not personally offended for myself but for every woman. A degrading comment won’t taint my confidence or very positive body image but it’s still extremely uncalled for and if they talk like this to/about one woman then very likely they are about others. Would you want someone talking to your daughter this way? Your sister? Your mom? Your best friend?…..

A while ago on Facebook, someone told me I got thick like a thanksgiving turkey and wrote gobble gobble(i must admit I do find it a bit amusing). For all he knows I may be a woman with an eating disorder. I’m not but he doesn’t know that. And it’s an insult to every woman thin, overweight, average, athletic, muscular…to view even just one of us solely or mostly in terms of our body and compare us to food! To say a rude comment about my body is to insult every woman, everywhere.

He meant it as a compliment but I did not warmly receive it like I usually do when someone compliments me. 
Usually I look at the person’s intention even if it turns out to seem rude or less than pleasant. If the person meant well, I usually focus on that.
But all I saw here is his thoughtlessness.
Just like this “joke.” Maybe it was meant to be funny but it’s too thoughtless, in my opinion, to overlook it just because he meant to be funny.

And if someone doesn’t like how someone looks in public, the person can turn the other way. We don’t have to stop and stare!
What I wear on *MY* body has nothing to do with anyone else. If I’m too fat, too thin, too slobby, too old, too flabby, too whatever…they can look the other way. I will never encourage someone to not wear something because someone else doesn’t like it. 

Even if we know/think a girl won’t mind the remark, the point is, it’s just rude and pointless. 

I don’t even see how this can be considered a funny joke. 
And I am extremely hard to offend. I am very easy going and easily amused in general.
I let things slide easily. 
People have told me I should be more offended than I am over things.
But this is one of the things I think is good to address and not overlook. 
I agree with you completely. 
I would compliment/encourage the girl who is the target of the nonsense if I witnessed it while out & about. I want to bring more love into places where there isn’t enough. 
Then when she thinks back to that occasion, she won’t just remember the thoughtlessness/callousness of the person, she’ll remember the warmth and love shown to her by another. 
Beauty comes in all sizes, physiques, colors, personalities, traits, ages….<3

The Shameful Sheep

There are very few things in life that make me angry enough to want to rip somebody’s face off and and wear it as a diaper. Very few. Actually, I pride myself in knowing how to take a joke and rarely being offended by things. Well, yesterday I had one of those moments where a face-diaper almost became a real thing, generously coupled with a swift kick to the balls. (I was in a giving mood… what can I say?)

Guys… telling a woman she shouldn’t wear yoga pants in public because she’s overweight is something that should never happen. Especially when you follow it up with the fact that it’s nothing to do with how it makes her feel, but she shouldn’t wear them because it’s hurting YOUR eyes. I don’t care if you meant it as a joke or not. You’re a prick and fuck you. Seriously…

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Don’t cry!

I love this! Things will work out eventually and even if they don’t, we will be ok. Life goes on & on & on. We just need love, patience, and to muster all the strength we have and maintain a positive attitude and all will be alright. ❤ Thank You!! 😀

Thank You for Saving My Life

❤ ❤ "Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around." ~Leo Buscaglia

autismthoughts

This post has less to do with autism than it does with depression, but depression isn’t uncommon for people with autism so I think it still applies here.

I have thought about dying since I was old enough to pull the handle on a car door. I just couldn’t help but think of what it would be like to open the door on the freeway and roll out into oncoming traffic. It probably sounds pretty grotesque, but it’s what I thought about as a 5 year old. I just had this sadness built up inside of me and the only way I could see it disappearing was through dying.

This post, however, is not about dying. It is about living. You see, I’m still here. Even though I have wanted to die for as long as I can remember, I’m still living. And the reason I am still living…

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Depression Doesn’t Mean I’m Not Happy

Yes! Depression is a sickness; it does not mean we are not naturally happy people or that all our smiles and laughter is fake even on the days we’re depressed. It doesn’t mean we’re miserable. It’s not a bad attitude or bleak outlook on life. Just like physical illnesses and symptoms occur for very happy people, so can depressive symptoms and episodes. I have frequent suicidal thoughts & urges off and on. But it doesn’t mean I’m not a happy girl. I can be having a very happy day then out of nowhere be hit with depression and sink into dark despair and feel like killing myself all in one day. But even with depression, I’m lighthearted and easily amused. Depression will never take that away. Depression is not my personality or attitude. It’s a true sickness that takes me over. But underneath I’m still the happy me I naturally am. Please check out this wonderful post to get a better idea of what depression is like for us who have it like this, a lifelong condition. We’re some of the happiest, wisest people you can meet! ❤ 😀

autismthoughts

I want you to know that depression doesn’t keep me from being happy. I know that sounds like a contradiction, but when we remember that depression is simply a mental illness, or in other words, sickness that occurs in the mind, it makes sense.

I have an undiagnosed medical condition that has prevented me from being able to eat normally. Although it can be serious at times and it means my eating habits widely differ from those of most people, I am overall fairly healthy. The same is true with my mental illness. Although I may have long periods of darkness when I see little light or hope in life, I am overall happy.

In fact, I am one of the happiest people I know. Even though I think about suicide sometimes, even though I still struggle with desires for self injury, even though I sometimes cry for hours at a…

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